![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 27 to 51 of 56. Go back in thread:
Posted by Dr. Bob on January 13, 2005, at 22:47:58
In reply to Re: Ignore feature » Toph, posted by Atticus on January 13, 2005, at 20:41:10
> I'd sure like to see Bob slow down on his restrictions here and give them more thought. And I'd really like to go to Admin someday and read about him loosening some of his plethora of rules because he thought we had it in us to handle it.
Please try not to take it personally. I think it has to do with the size of the group rather than the particular members.
This used to be like a small town, without many rules, and now it's like a big city, with more.
It's not that people in cities are like children...
Bob
Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 13, 2005, at 22:55:04
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Fallen4MyT, posted by Atticus on January 13, 2005, at 20:52:42
Atticus, realistically many ARE being ignored by others who choose to ignore them they just get skipped over, myself included by extra work by the ones who ignore them. It's "choice" and freedom that separates us from those on a psychward or prison. I have BEEN on a psychward just overnight but been there. On the issue of the choice to use a button to ignore or not is still a FREEDOM I would like. As you like to be able to choose to use certain words I choose to be able to ignore certain posts or posters in an easier fashion. One could not put *trigger* on posts and take the choice away from those readers too I mean we are all adults and should learn from others who differ correct? IMO yes but some wanted the word *trigger* and I use it..I could skip it and let them experience what its like to meet someone of another viewpoint for that diversity you speak of. An astrikt or an ignore button its the same issue boiled down to the freedom to choose to use or not and not having that choice made for you by someone else. To me the words, the usage of trigger and ignore all fall under the heading of censorship done for you..I would rather have the choice.
> First, please see my prior response to Toph. Second, it's not me being ignored that bothers me in the least. But it does bother me that other people will be ignored. Sometimes we learn the most from the voices and ideas of the people who are most different from us. I think encounters with diverse types of people is one of the most valuable aspects of this site. To tune out anyone who rubs you or me the wrong way seems to negate that positive aspect in many ways.
> Third, in the words of the Buddha:
> Technology is not always the answer. ;) Atticus
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 14, 2005, at 1:28:43
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Fallen4MyT, posted by Atticus on January 13, 2005, at 20:52:42
> Sometimes we learn the most from the voices and ideas of the people who are most different from us.
And sometimes we don't, sometimes people just reeeeeeeeeeeally bug us a lot.
You know, I would like more than anything to be able to say I could live up to your philosophy all the time. I do, most of the time, or at least it's a living goal of mine.
However, this is a mental health site, and there are times, when one is exhausted, overwrought,
withdrawing from medication.. on the wrong medication.. you know the drill, and what you need is comfort, or to ask a simple question.
Often there are people with their personal agendas, those who seem to post repeatedly the anti-medication philosophies, or the all you need is to think positively philosophies, or those who post on the therapy board only to consistantly mock people's experiences with therapy. Yes frequently they get blocked, but it always takes a while.
I'm not sure I learn much from those people, and on a good day sure I can tolerate them, and in a perfect world I could tolerate them all the time, but having an illness means you're always tolerating something, and at times on the board it would be really nice to have the relief of just being able to say..
"Okay, I 'don't have to deal with you today"
because in real life we don't have that option.
I think it's better than fuming, I think it's better than snarling back at them, and I think it's better than thinking you're the one who has to leave, because you can't tolerate someone else, and at times it does get that bad.
I think the people on this board are incredibly
(why do I always forget how to spell incredibley?) tolerant, and I doubt it would be anyone who is insecure about getting "ignored" who would actually be ignored, There do seem to be a type, who have come in various incarnations throughout the years who are very confident, who just don't seem concerned what people think, or they enjoy stirring things up, and they are the one's most likely to be put on the *ignore* list
in my experience anyway.
> Third, in the words of the Buddha:
> Technology is not always the answer.True, but we are already in the thick of it with Babble..
Posted by alexandra_k on January 14, 2005, at 2:43:17
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Atticus, posted by Gabbix2 on January 14, 2005, at 1:28:43
You don't have to read peoples posts.
You don't have to read the posts if you are having trouble with the poster.\
It isn't as bad as IRL when you can't help but hear their noise.
If the posts are xxxxx'd out then you still have to scroll past them.
I don't see how this helps.
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 14, 2005, at 3:12:29
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo, posted by alexandra_k on January 14, 2005, at 2:43:17
Often times the subject headings are enough to get things heated, sespecially if the post is directed toward you, many of those experienced at this sort of thing post their entire message in the subject heading. And realistically sometimes ignoring a message is extremely difficult even if you know it's the best thing for you. This is just another option, and for some it would be helpful, it's a choice. Sometimes it would be better for both parties too.
Posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:01:41
In reply to Re: Ignore feature » Toph, posted by Atticus on January 13, 2005, at 20:41:10
Hi Atticus,
I just want to leap in and say that the Ignore feature really was not Dr Bobs idea.. If you follow the thread to its inception, it was ME that posted it.
So please, accuse me of these things, not Dr Bob.
Imagine, if this feature was live, you could put me on ignore and not have to watch me treat people like children *s*
*I* have been pushed to a suicide attempt by another poster here. Ofcourse, they didn't force me to do it, and it was my own reaction to that poster. But, imagine if I had simply been able to click an ignore button.. I wouldn't have had to see the posts, and I wouldn't have had to deal with the level of pain they caused me. And, I'd also like to point out that this was fairly recent, and since I have been alot more "stable".
Nikki
Posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:05:04
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Fallen4MyT, posted by Atticus on January 13, 2005, at 20:52:42
"Technology is not always the answer"
Unfortunately we are dealing with a "technological" way of interaction here. Technology IS the answer for us to simply communicate. technology IS the answer for us here.
If technology isn't the answer for some, they can always go out in the world and find people to talk face to face with.
Nikki
Posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:11:20
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo, posted by alexandra_k on January 14, 2005, at 2:43:17
How about this as a small example.
Poster A writes something whilst in distress. Poster B is offended by what Poster A has written, so B takes it to the Admin board. B's queries are not resolved, so takes it back tot eh admin, and again.. and again..
Surely, it would be best for A, whilst in deep distress, to simply NOT KNOW they are being talked about, and discussed.. To be able to come here for some much needed support, without having to see comments about them.
dunno, maybe this isn't something you would be hurt by, but many others are.
Nikki
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 14, 2005, at 9:57:16
In reply to This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » Atticus, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:01:41
I was confused by that too, I see it as another choice not a rule, so I didn't understand how it could be seen as infantilizing. I thought perhaps I'd missed something, but I guess I didn't. Thanks
Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 14, 2005, at 19:17:37
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Atticus, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:05:04
Great point by both you and Gabbix on this being technology :) . I see some of the posters are against the freedom to use the ignore button yet want freedom from rules in here. Makes no sense to me
> "Technology is not always the answer"
>
> Unfortunately we are dealing with a "technological" way of interaction here. Technology IS the answer for us to simply communicate. technology IS the answer for us here.
>
> If technology isn't the answer for some, they can always go out in the world and find people to talk face to face with.
>
> Nikki
Posted by alexandra_k on January 14, 2005, at 19:19:16
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » alexandra_k, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:11:20
Ok. I think I understand.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 19:26:48
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Atticus, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:05:04
Although...
I still don't like the idea much.
I guess that I figure that letting us do that is kind of 'protecting' us more than may be good for us in the long run.
That although some things can be really really hard that it is better to deal with it. Then feel stronger for having gotten through.
That people don't have to read posts just because they appear.
That people have been known to bypass admin for a while as well...
All that being said, I don't suppose it matters to me as much as it does to others. I just know that I will never use it. Maybe it is better to be able to choose...
Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 15, 2005, at 19:55:47
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » nikkit2, posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 19:26:48
or members of the Nazi party as I personally do not want to socialize with them.. I like choice and freedom. To me this saying you have to mix with all groups and people to grow and thrive is; to be civil not for me. At my age I know what kind of people I care to associate with by now..I would want the ability to ignore online as I do in real life, I do not go to skid row to be open to life nor hang in a prison or with gang members.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 20:21:29
In reply to Choice is good...I do not want the KKK in my house, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 15, 2005, at 19:55:47
Although this is not your house, it is a public forum...
Also there are civility rules to prevent any KKK members etc from causing you repeated offense...
I guess that it is ones personal choice who one associates with.
I just think that education and support should be freely offered to all...
But yes, I suppose it is your personal choice and allowing you to block people will make implementing that all the easier for you. You won't have to 'waste your time' seeing the names or subject headings of posters who you don't want to associate with and that you don't want to offer anything to.
But you already have the choice to ignore posters threads and so all you will gain is the ability to not even have to look at their names and subject headings.
It is your choice. But I am sorry that you feel that way.
Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 15, 2005, at 20:42:08
In reply to Re: Choice is good » Fallen4MyT, posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 20:21:29
I know it is not my house but the principle still applies I am glad you see that later on in your post. Thank you for understanding why I like this freedon and how it would make it easier for me to have this..choice
> Although this is not your house, it is a public forum...
>
> Also there are civility rules to prevent any KKK members etc from causing you repeated offense...
>
> I guess that it is ones personal choice who one associates with.
>
> I just think that education and support should be freely offered to all...
>
> But yes, I suppose it is your personal choice and allowing you to block people will make implementing that all the easier for you. You won't have to 'waste your time' seeing the names or subject headings of posters who you don't want to associate with and that you don't want to offer anything to.
>
> But you already have the choice to ignore posters threads and so all you will gain is the ability to not even have to look at their names and subject headings.
>
> It is your choice. But I am sorry that you feel that way.
>
>
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:47:45
In reply to This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » Atticus, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:01:41
No, I'm well aware you began the thread. But once the idea was out there and potentially planted in Dr. Bob's head -- and he, not you, would be the person to institute it -- then he became the person to address. The second part of the post was more of an overview as to why I so often disagree with his implementation of ideas such as these. Ta. Atticus
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:48:59
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » Atticus, posted by nikkit2 on January 14, 2005, at 8:05:04
But what if I want to do both with as little interference as possible? Atticus
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:52:11
In reply to Re: This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » nikkit2, posted by Gabbix2 on January 14, 2005, at 9:57:16
As I said to Nikki, I realize this was her suggestion, but now Bob is aware of it and in a position to implement it. So it's he whom it is more relevant to address. As for "infantilizing," I see it as the ongoing "childproofing" of these pages, where as adults decisions to communicate as adults are restricted more and more. Children have very little control over their environment. Atticus
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:54:46
In reply to Re: People may be ignoring you now soooooo » nikkit2, posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 19:26:48
Alex,
You just stated all my points perfectly. Spot on. Thanks. ;) Atticus
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 17, 2005, at 19:56:26
In reply to Re: This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » Gabbix2, posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:52:11
Seeing we have the choice as to whether or not we want to use it, I see it as giving us more control, not less, that's the part I don't understand. And you know, I mean that sincerely about not understanding, it's not covert b*tchiness
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:57:53
In reply to Re: Choice is good » Fallen4MyT, posted by alexandra_k on January 15, 2005, at 20:21:29
Again, Alex is stating my points more clearly, without the sometimes knee-jerk stereotypical Irish temper that may obscure them when I communicate (or attempt to). Atticus
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 17, 2005, at 20:10:45
In reply to Re: Choice is good » alexandra_k, posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 19:57:53
> Again, Alex is stating my points more clearly, without the sometimes knee-jerk stereotypical Irish temper that may obscure them when I communicate (or attempt to). Atticus
Okay, I have to admit, being told that I shouldn't have this option for my personal use, that it would be better for me not to have it because I will learn from experiencing what I find intolerable, made me feel infantilized somewhat. I think those choices are for me to make.
Posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 20:31:17
In reply to Re: This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » Atticus, posted by Gabbix2 on January 17, 2005, at 19:56:26
You know, Gabbi, you're right. This is probably more about my issues with authority and rules than anything else. I have to admit that, with the extreme rapid cycling aspect of my BP disorder, I think Dr. Bob is often just in the wrong place at the wrong time and gets strafed. Thanks for the food for thought. Atticus
Posted by Gabbix2 on January 17, 2005, at 20:58:51
In reply to Re: This WASN'T DR BOB'S IDEA! » Gabbix2, posted by Atticus on January 17, 2005, at 20:31:17
Thank *you* for not taking it personally. Although it never stops me : ) it is harder for me to state my disagreement with someone on the board I especially like. I like getting food for thought too, but you never can tell whether or not someone else will.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 17, 2005, at 21:04:17
In reply to Re: Choice is good, posted by Gabbix2 on January 17, 2005, at 20:10:45
> Okay, I have to admit, being told that I shouldn't have this option for my personal use, that it would be better for me not to have it because I will learn from experiencing what I find intolerable, made me feel infantilized somewhat. I think those choices are for me to make.
To be contrary I find it infantilizing were we to be given the choice not to face situations that we may find 'intolerable'. This is especially true in this case because it is not a strategy that one can use IRL. It is true that this is a virtual community and is different from a RL community in a number of ways in virtue of the technology employed but I guess it depends on whether our interaction here is supposed to help us back in RL or whether this is just a place to escape it for a while...
Ok so it can be described as infantalizing if we are granted this and if we are not granted this.Maybe agree to disagree again :-)
Go forward in thread:
Psycho-Babble Administration | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.