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Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on September 29, 2009, at 21:46:01
I go throught periods of severe depression which causes just nothing to people because i've fallen apart for a period of time.
One thing, I have noticed..."don't alway's say I" because it tends to lead people that your granidiose, and talk about yourself alot, which is good! yet it repel's people in some aspect's, trust me I've learned from experience. It's easy to talk about yourself, it's fun, yet it's not great all the time.
Grandiosity...sam K had mentioned this to me, actually gave me a online look at a book that explained this in a patient, they refer to themselves 'highly', and kinda seem to say 'i'm a high-roller' in aspect's of trying to convey that your a "b*d*ss", the cool term. I've gone through periods of this, yet it has to be relevent with your life experience, what you have done, if you have achieved alot, then hey it's great to talk about yourself, but it just depends on people, because i've seen it repel, and discuste people.
For a while about 2 years ago, all I did was talk about my problems, and annoy alot of people. Well, let me think why? just what I explained above. After that, the feeling of irrelvency from problems can lead you to think, the opposite, postive feelings, greatness, thinking obsessing over yourself, making yourself better looking (which is good, yet in the bible it's vanity)
It's the delusion that you believe, yet it has to keep up with what accomplishment's you've done, and your additude, somepeople are natraully born "b*d*ss*s" they know how to make things "cool".
Like one day, I'll walk into a place and feel i'm walking on sunshine, then the next...is gloom doom. It's either a perfect image or nothing. In the middle is something that average people do everyday, have a stable life. And not feel diffrent everyday.
I don't understand how people live life, they just wake up and say "i'm awake, and I function" I have to put energy into it, and it burns out. Maybe it's the cycle of the Nuerotransmitters, oh! this just popped my head, Wellbutrin for some reason can start feelings of suicide, because it's the inhibition of dopamine, just like Ritilin, and Dexedrine. Low doses of Dex give bad feelings for me, usally 60mg in spread out doses (2 30mg) is the effective dose. Dexedrine is better over Ritilin for me. Anyways, having a good image such as a superhuman image, but it burns out, and goes to negative images, or idleness. Which there nothing wrong with idleness in your idenity, it's how you grow. What would really be good, is still be finding things about you at 70-80 years old.
Anyways, quack...ran out of words to say.
Later
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