![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 79 to 103 of 143. Go back in thread:
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 13:53:08
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 11:19:00
For those who have found effexor useful in the face of devastating depression, I am happy for you. My son did not face devastating depression, and he would probably have been better off with NO treatment than the ridiculous treatment he received. I could not know, nor could his father have known, that the doctor was incompetent. But the bottom line for me remains that in my opinion, the doctor's obligation is to inform the patient's family that there is some danger of suicidality (as they so clinically put it!), so that we could have known to watch for this.
I understand that people die from all sorts of things every day. Everyone's life is a tragedy waiting to happen. For me, however, this loss of life was preventable, and I will probably never forgive this doctor.
DM
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 13:56:08
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 13:32:47
"placing a hot cup of coffee between one’s legs"
????????????
We are talking about apples and oranges here! This is not even in the same realm...
Try to think about what you are saying before opening your mouth!
Posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 14:37:32
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by simon levane on February 16, 2006, at 12:24:22
Dear Mr. Levane,
I can emphasize with your feelings and express my condolences at the tragedy that has befallen your family and others from the seriousness of mood disorders. The fact is from my experiences and knowledge no mood disorder should ever be taken lightly and what at one moment may seem trivial could easily and rapidly escalate into suicidal ideations and the successful attempt at taking one’s own life.
Whether or not you are aware there are many successful adolescent suicides without the patient ever being on any medication and/or treatment. While I am knowledgeable from my readings that it is thought that in some instances the use of medications maybe a causation or contributing factor to increasing suicidal ideations the fact still remains there is no definitive correlations and many conflicting research reports.
While I cannot undo that which has taken place I can share my experiences, research and knowledge without giving any advice. If one finds it comforting and enabling to take legal action then do as one sees fit. While I still face the possibility of my spouse taking her life one day I continue to advocate for education. Mood disorders should be taken seriously. Mood disorders are potentially fatal. Medications to treat these disorders should be taken seriously. Awareness that medications have potential side-effects should be taken seriously. Awareness that medications not only have potential side-effects but can lead to death also applies to medications other than psychotropics. For that matter one should be aware that over the counter drugs such as aspirin can kill too.
You speak about “risk management.” Even as a youngster I heard an old saying when one takes drugs, “There is no free ride as there is a price to pay in one form or another.” I’ve been handling “risk management” for over 42 years in collaboration with doctors, good doctors and more importantly better doctors. In our travails we’ve encountered doctors who think their deities and others that didn’t listen. We simply made informed decisions and moved on to another physician. While many doctors heed the call “TO DO NO HARM” others are truly compassionate and caring and do make their best efforts to relieve the angish, pain and suffering of their patients suffering from horrific mood disorders and go above their call of duty to help. We have been fortunate to have had a number of those physicians attending to my spouse. While there are no guarantees when treating mood disorders one doctor in particular went beyond the bounds of the drug company specifications which I cited elsewhere relating to mega dosing of Effexor XR. The point I am making is the doctor suggested, we asked questions, we researched and made a reasonably informed decision regardless of the fact that this particular doctor was an M.D., professor, lecturer, researcher, published researcher and noted psychopharmacologist and authority. As a former DBSA facilitator I’ve listened to thousands of personal experiences of horror stories, tragedies and triumphs but we’ve always continued to encourage education, self-advocacy, support networks and systems and the like. There are no easy answers to what works or why these things happen but what we can do is to share our experiences and knowledge so hopefully others can benefit from those experiences both bad and good.
I would hope from your writings and that of “Devastated Mother” too that other parents reading this thread take the time to educate themselves quickly, to maintain lines of communication with one’s child, to try and discuss the situation with the attending physician and most importantly carefully observe any changes in the patient’s mood state especially when first initiating and/or changing any treatment regimen. I might also point out that it is not unheard of having to go through numerous treatment options and/or combinations of options in order to obtain a favorable response and/or outcome.
Warmly,
Herb
VNSdepression.com
.
Posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 15:19:32
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 13:56:08
Dear Devastated Mother,
“Try to think about what you are saying before opening your mouth!” – Devastated Mother
I try my best to always think very carefully not only as to what I post on various forums but what it is that I say face to face. What I cannot account for is one’s ability to read or not read and understand what is written.
The analogy of the cup of coffee was in response to a previous posters analogy of a plumber and toilet problem when compared to medical challenges and decision making. It also relates to the lack of responsibility taken upon the part of that particular individual who spilled the coffee and others that think alike.
I agree with you that plumbers, toilets, cups of coffee have no serious relationship to medical challenges and decision making although some folks apparently handle them with the same urgency and/or importance from my readings and they are not in the same rehelm. I agree with you and may I suggest you re-read “Linkadge’s” posting to understand my response to him/her.
“We are talking about apples and oranges here!” I am trying to convey the importance of education, self-advocacy and responsibility in the hope of saving lives through knowledge, understanding and informed decision making. Those are the friuts I leave here for those having interest.
I wish you all well and for those challenged by these various serious mood disorders I can only encourage hope and the most important word in my life, “persistence,” to achieve the wellness one seeks.
Warmly,
Herb
VNSdepression.com.
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 15:34:33
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » Devastated Mother, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 15:19:32
"I am trying to convey the importance of education, self-advocacy and responsibility in the hope of saving lives through knowledge, understanding and informed decision making. Those are the friuts I leave here for those having interest."
We're all thrilled for you that you know all about the importance of education, self advocacy and responsibility. We unfortunately made the deadly mistake of trusting our health care providers to do the right thing. And our children paid for our trust with their lives. If you think your ridiculous words are helping anyone, you are seriously mistaken. What we are trying to convey here is that there is no way we would have known about what our children were facing, because a health care provider CHOSE NOT TO MAKE US PRIVY TO INFORMATION THAT WAS VITAL TO OUR CHILDREN'S LIVES.
Can you understand this? Are we not being clear? Or is your soapbox too high?
> Dear Devastated Mother,
>
> “Try to think about what you are saying before opening your mouth!” – Devastated Mother
>
> I try my best to always think very carefully not only as to what I post on various forums but what it is that I say face to face. What I cannot account for is one’s ability to read or not read and understand what is written.
>
> The analogy of the cup of coffee was in response to a previous posters analogy of a plumber and toilet problem when compared to medical challenges and decision making. It also relates to the lack of responsibility taken upon the part of that particular individual who spilled the coffee and others that think alike.
>
> I agree with you that plumbers, toilets, cups of coffee have no serious relationship to medical challenges and decision making although some folks apparently handle them with the same urgency and/or importance from my readings and they are not in the same rehelm. I agree with you and may I suggest you re-read “Linkadge’s” posting to understand my response to him/her.
>
> “We are talking about apples and oranges here!” I am trying to convey the importance of education, self-advocacy and responsibility in the hope of saving lives through knowledge, understanding and informed decision making. Those are the friuts I leave here for those having interest.
>
> I wish you all well and for those challenged by these various serious mood disorders I can only encourage hope and the most important word in my life, “persistence,” to achieve the wellness one seeks.
>
> Warmly,
> Herb
> VNSdepression.com
>
> .
>
>
>
Posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:38:39
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 13:32:47
It would be appreciated if you try and condense your views into a smaller portions. I am finding it difficult to grasp the coherance in so many seemingly unrelated points.
Anyhow, on the topic of Brittain's prescribing restrictions.
http://www.ahrp.org/infomail/03/12/15.php
At current, what are U.S. doctors required to do with regards to the potential for drugs to induce suicidiality in youth? A doctor may get away with one sentence, in the description of the drug's potential hazards.Nobody is saying that the drugs should be banned, but there needs to be a stronger action plan for monitoring the use of these drugs. In my own case, I have been prescribed a months worth of drugs, and a 2-4 minaute follow-up maybe once every 6 weeks. That is crap. That is a recipe for diaster in my oppinion, *especially* in teens who are going to be in a place of increasing danger due to their often absent parent-child relationships.
Why should you expect a depressed person to be so motivated as to the safety of their treatement? They are depressed - ie. they want to die, and they don't give a crap to begin with. What you are expecting of the suicidal patient doesn't make sence. Its like asking an Alzheimer's patient to *remember* to take their memory pills - its a situation that is flawed from the get-go.
Linkadge
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 15:44:09
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » lifetime, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:38:39
Linkadge,
You make some very valid points, which have been bothering me for some time. Particularly, the black box warning everyone talks about, that warns of the dangers of particular drugs. Are these meant for the depressed person, expecting that they will call their family and say, "By the way, my drugs might cause me to become suicidal, so watch me!"Really! So, for whom are they written?
>It would be appreciated if you try and condense your views into a smaller portions. I am finding it difficult to grasp the coherance in so many seemingly unrelated points.
>
> Anyhow, on the topic of Brittain's prescribing restrictions.
>
> http://www.ahrp.org/infomail/03/12/15.php
>
>
> At current, what are U.S. doctors required to do with regards to the potential for drugs to induce suicidiality in youth? A doctor may get away with one sentence, in the description of the drug's potential hazards.
>
> Nobody is saying that the drugs should be banned, but there needs to be a stronger action plan for monitoring the use of these drugs. In my own case, I have been prescribed a months worth of drugs, and a 2-4 minaute follow-up maybe once every 6 weeks. That is crap. That is a recipe for diaster in my oppinion, *especially* in teens who are going to be in a place of increasing danger due to their often absent parent-child relationships.
>
> Why should you expect a depressed person to be so motivated as to the safety of their treatement? They are depressed - ie. they want to die, and they don't give a crap to begin with. What you are expecting of the suicidal patient doesn't make sence. Its like asking an Alzheimer's patient to *remember* to take their memory pills - its a situation that is flawed from the get-go.
>
>
>
> Linkadge
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
Posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:44:37
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » Devastated Mother, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 15:19:32
Lives are being lost here, and you are arguing semantics. With the analogy of the plummer I was simply alluding to the fact that drug companies are responsable for knowing their products.
Look at Vioxx. Do you think they got away with - "oh sorry you should have done your homework". Of course not. The drug company had to deal with the safety problems of their medication. Like I said before. Other countries have thought enough about the issue to inforce stronger restrictions, so this isn't just an idea that we are pulling out of our ...
Linkadge
Posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 16:09:18
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » lifetime, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:44:37
Look at the drug clozapine. It can cause a fatal reduction in white blood cell count, and so they developed a mantitory once a month clozapine monitoring system. They don't say to the patient - this drug may kill you so we were hoping that you would go to get your blood checked once a month. No they *force* the patient to get monitored.
I'd like to see an effexor screeing program whereby the patient has manditory doctors appointmens at standardized intervals, standardized informing procedures, standardized suicidality questionaires, manditory parent/guardian/teacher informing etc. Manditory phone check-ups, manditory psychotherapy, the works
Cause when I was on effexor and I was suicidal, I just got the impression..who cares about me? The doctor sees me for 2-4 minautes...he doesn't care. For goodnsess sakes, why would I want to trust a doctor with my deepest emotions, when he is practically starting his stopwatch when I enter the room... I say forget it. You don't care about me..I don't care about you. If you're only going to give me 5 minautes, you don't disearve to know how I feel. I'm just going to tell you whatever I think you want to hear so that I can get out of the office.
Feeling better?.......yeah
Less depressed?.......yeah
Hows school going?....fine
Sleeping better?......yeahIt's like....just leave me alone.
Linkadge
Posted by ed_uk on February 16, 2006, at 16:15:45
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » lifetime, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:44:37
Hi Link
Treating depressed children with SSRIs and Effexor is not actually 'banned' in the UK. Doctors can still legally prescribe all SSRIs and Effexor to children. The government has advised doctors not to prescribe SSRIs (except fluoxetine) to depressed children however. Some SSRIs are approved for the treatment of childhood OCD in the UK, but none are approved for depression. Fluoxetine is approved for childhood depression in some countries.
You may be interested to hear that the offical UK data sheet for sertraline (Lustral, Zoloft) states.....
'There is limited knowledge with respect to an effect on sexual development in children.'
Kind regards
Ed
Posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 16:53:31
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » linkadge, posted by ed_uk on February 16, 2006, at 16:15:45
Hmmm.
I guess my point was that certain parts of Europe have taken a more active stance on the use of AD's than the states has. Didn't they release some doctor recomendations like, for depression, first psychotherapy, family psychotherapy, exercise should be suggested, and the use of AD's restricted to cases involving psychosis etc? Not sure of the exact wording of the statement.
Linkadge
Posted by ed_uk on February 16, 2006, at 17:04:12
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 16:53:31
Hi Link
>Didn't they release some doctor recomendations like, for depression, first psychotherapy, family psychotherapy, exercise should be suggested, and the use of AD's restricted to cases involving psychosis etc? Not sure of the exact wording of the statement.
Yes, something to that effect. SSRIs such as fluoxetine were recommended as a first line treatment *if* drugs were indicated. GPs were cautioned not to prescribe Effexor unless they had a special interest in mental health. The risk of withdrawal symptoms, toxicity in overdose and potential cardiotoxicity of Effexor were of concern. It was suggested that Effexor should only be presribed by psychiatrists.
Ed
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on February 16, 2006, at 21:05:08
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 15:44:09
Thanks to DM and SL for posting so openly about such a painful experience. It truly might save a life. And it gets us all to think a little about our society and medications.
First, I must say that I typically am not a huge advocate of lawsuits when things can be resolved by other means. However, in this case, I must admit that I am hoping you will pursue this route. While I do think that the MD was acting according to the standards of medical practice by maintaining confidentiality about treatment, it does sound like he needs to be held accountable for sloppy, irresponsible work.
For example, lets say that your child was suicidal before getting the effexor (I know you don't think that was the case, but for the sake of a general example, think about it.) Did the MD ask enough questions to assess whether the patient was suicidal or not? Did he refer the patient to a specialist (i.e. psychiatrist) for a complete assessment and treatment plan? Did he refer the patient to a psychotherapist to find other ways to address issues?
I'm willing to bet that the answer is "no" to all of the above. So many GP's skip these important steps and don't know how to address mental health probs. But they keep handing out psych meds. That is not okay. They need to know that if they are practicing in a specialty in which they are not trained, a tragedy could result. And, as the prescribing physician, they are accountable. The medical community needs to wake up about these issues.
Wishing you strength and healing.
Best,
EE
Posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 21:10:19
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » lifetime, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 15:38:39
Linkadge,
You raise many valid points which I can easily agree with and while we agree to seek and obtain the ideal or optimum health care system the reality exits that things do not work or are not working the way you or I would like to have them. In fact, our president is recommending major cuts in health care and social services in this country which will certainly stress even more the patient and the health care system in this country.
I am a spouse, a parent and a grandparent. I know what I do for my own and I know what I have done when asked to advocate for others. While I cannot do for those that have past on I can hope and try to get my message through in order to prevent responses similar to the following one by sharing my experiences and knowledge:
“We unfortunately made the deadly mistake of trusting our health care providers to do the right thing. And our children paid for our trust with their lives. If you think your ridiculous words are helping anyone, you are seriously mistaken.” – Devastated Mother
While this particular parent believes my words to be “ridiculous” or not “helping anyone” I won’t debate the point with her lack of knowledge of what I have and have not accomplished. If one single parent reads this thread and comes away thinking and questioning any medications, doctors, treatments and/or therapies it would have accomplished something worthwhile. While I cannot do anything to save or help those parents whose children have past there maybe a parent intelligent enough to question and read before blindly accepting and proceeding just because a doctor said something. Doctors do make mistakes and they are human and their mistakes are in the graveyard. Labels are written and drug inserts and pharmacy printouts are for those capable of reading although one is not forced to do so. While you diverge from the principle of being educated and informed to all the other possible extenuating circumstances the point is information is available so maybe one of your precepts should be that the patient and his/her support persons must sit down and take a mandatory course before beginning any treatment regimen. That would eliminate the physician oversights and/or inadvertent negligence to inform and to place some responsibility in the hands of the patient and/or his/her support persons.
You are right about some patients being incapable of understanding or following instructions let alone reading some drug literature. So do as I do, advocate and encourage for a support network of friends if family and/or loved ones are not available to lend support. There are coping skills we discuss and share for all and those who must go it alone and while you and I would like to see the ideal system it doesn’t exist so we do the best we can with what we have while trying to improve the system, eliminate the stigma and in our country battle for parity with health insurance carriers for those suffering the medical illnesses of mood disorders.
While you’re at it I’ve referenced some links for you as to the conflicting studies and information relating to antidepressants and suicide.
http://www.aei.org/publications/filter.all,pubID.23686/pub_detail.asp
http://www.pn.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/40/10/52-a
http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/163/1/41
http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/health_medical/article344226.ece
Warmly,
Herb
VNSdepression.com.
Posted by dancingstar on February 16, 2006, at 23:15:06
In reply to Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on January 21, 2006, at 2:23:04
This thread was brought to my attention by a friend.
DM, words can't express how sorry I am for your loss. I was so very sad to read your posts. Though I wasn't damaged anywhere near as badly, I was hurt beyond all reason by having taken Effexor. There were no warnings. There was nowhere to turn for help.
My heart goes out to you completely. I feel strongly that these companies either need to lay the facts out on the table, unvarnished, so that people know exactly how dangerous these drugs are and stop handing them out like candy or get them off the market so that no one else can be harmed by them. Effexor is currently one of the four most widely prescribed drugs in the United States.
I hope that someone reads your words and is spared the endless tears. The patient and their family cannot be expected to know everything. We might as well all go to medical school if we need to be that informed, and there isn't any point in doctors' needing to write prescriptions if we are taking responsibility for what medications we take.
Blessings,
Bebe
Posted by gardenergirl on February 16, 2006, at 23:24:13
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on February 16, 2006, at 15:34:33
> If you think your ridiculous words are helping anyone, you are seriously mistaken. ...>
> Can you understand this? Are we not being clear? Or is your soapbox too high?
>I realize this is a sensitive topic and that emotions can run high, but please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
Follow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should be directed to Admin and should of course themselves be civil.
Regards,
gg acting as deputy for Dr. Bob
Posted by gardenergirl on February 16, 2006, at 23:34:51
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » linkadge, posted by lifetime on February 16, 2006, at 21:10:19
> there maybe a parent intelligent enough to question and read before blindly accepting and proceeding just because a doctor said something.
Please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
Follow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should be directed to Admin and should of course themselves be civil.Regards,
gg acting as deputy for Dr. Bob
Posted by lifetime on February 17, 2006, at 0:07:16
In reply to Please be civil » lifetime, posted by gardenergirl on February 16, 2006, at 23:34:51
Sorry, I do apologize to the forum members for any offensive statements.
Warmly,
Herb
VNSdepression.com.
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 2:36:01
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Emily Elizabeth on February 16, 2006, at 21:05:08
In my own case, my son was not with a regular MD. He WAS seeing a psychiatrist, so the knowledge of what the medication could do was clearly there. So, no excuses. My son had been seeing another doctor and had to change doctors because his student status changed and he could no longer see the campus doctors, who had been doing a reasonably good job, we thought. Every doctor he had seen who asked him received releases from him so that we could be involved in his care. This one did not ask, I think, even though the medication being prescribed should have not even been prescribed without family knowing the dangers.
We did not know anything about the medication he was taking, and in fact we out of the country when he took his life. We would have done a number of things differently had we known. Of course, I know some of the skeptics are thinking that hindsight is 20 20, but I can assure you that I would never have ignored this black box warning had I been given any choice. Since I was not informed, I effectively had no choice.
> Thanks to DM and SL for posting so openly about such a painful experience. It truly might save a life. And it gets us all to think a little about our society and medications.
>
> First, I must say that I typically am not a huge advocate of lawsuits when things can be resolved by other means. However, in this case, I must admit that I am hoping you will pursue this route. While I do think that the MD was acting according to the standards of medical practice by maintaining confidentiality about treatment, it does sound like he needs to be held accountable for sloppy, irresponsible work.
>
> For example, lets say that your child was suicidal before getting the effexor (I know you don't think that was the case, but for the sake of a general example, think about it.) Did the MD ask enough questions to assess whether the patient was suicidal or not? Did he refer the patient to a specialist (i.e. psychiatrist) for a complete assessment and treatment plan? Did he refer the patient to a psychotherapist to find other ways to address issues?
>
> I'm willing to bet that the answer is "no" to all of the above. So many GP's skip these important steps and don't know how to address mental health probs. But they keep handing out psych meds. That is not okay. They need to know that if they are practicing in a specialty in which they are not trained, a tragedy could result. And, as the prescribing physician, they are accountable. The medical community needs to wake up about these issues.
>
> Wishing you strength and healing.
>
> Best,
> EE
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 2:42:52
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor » Devastated Mother, posted by dancingstar on February 16, 2006, at 23:15:06
Bebe,
Thank you sincerely for your words of comfort. I am grateful you did not share my son's fate. The drug companies are so rich and powerful that it takes an army to get anything changed. I am not an army. I am trying to prepare myself to lobby in my own way for change, but I am not even sure where to start.
> This thread was brought to my attention by a friend.
>
> DM, words can't express how sorry I am for your loss. I was so very sad to read your posts. Though I wasn't damaged anywhere near as badly, I was hurt beyond all reason by having taken Effexor. There were no warnings. There was nowhere to turn for help.
>
> My heart goes out to you completely. I feel strongly that these companies either need to lay the facts out on the table, unvarnished, so that people know exactly how dangerous these drugs are and stop handing them out like candy or get them off the market so that no one else can be harmed by them. Effexor is currently one of the four most widely prescribed drugs in the United States.
>
> I hope that someone reads your words and is spared the endless tears. The patient and their family cannot be expected to know everything. We might as well all go to medical school if we need to be that informed, and there isn't any point in doctors' needing to write prescriptions if we are taking responsibility for what medications we take.
>
> Blessings,
> Bebe
Posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 3:00:26
In reply to Please be civil » Devastated Mother, posted by gardenergirl on February 16, 2006, at 23:24:13
gardengirl,
Fair enough. My intent was not to be uncivil. I will try to be more cautious in the way I express myself. Or leave the site, which may be a better way to go at some point.
While I understand that people think that everyone should be well informed on drugs, the fact is that everyone is not. We all trust our doctors to some extent, and in this case trust was the farthest thing from what we should have done. We had no idea that the drug our son was taking could cause suicide, and I suppose we should have known. So it is our fault. OK.
Perhaps I should share with you exactly how I found out about the danger of the drug. Another of my children lived in the same city as the one who died, and in the face of anxiety and pain over the loss of his dear brother, went to the same doctor for help. He had no history of depression, and in fact was not suffering from the same issues his brother had. He had simply had a great trauma in his life -- he had lost his brother. This doctor prescribed the same lovely effexor for him as well. When I was told this by my son, I questioned him about it, learned the name of the drug, went on the internet and read to my horror the side effects of the drug. The black box was right there for all to see, had we known to look. So I spoke with my other son, and convinced him to go back to the doctor and question the prescription. Her response to him was that this drug would take care of the symptoms. So, I begged my son to stop taking the drug and he did, after a great deal of cajoling on my part. Oh, and after a bizarre episode which was so out of character for him that it could only have been caused by the drug, which in part led to his losing his job. Of course, he then would not go to any doctor for help in his pain over the loss of his brother, so we are dealing with it alone. He is fine, no thanks to this doctor.
So, there you have it. The education of DM. Who trusted a doctor and for trusting that doctor, lost a son.
> > If you think your ridiculous words are helping anyone, you are seriously mistaken. ...>
> > Can you understand this? Are we not being clear? Or is your soapbox too high?
> >
>
> I realize this is a sensitive topic and that emotions can run high, but please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
>
> If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
>
> Follow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should be directed to Admin and should of course themselves be civil.
>
> Regards,
> gg acting as deputy for Dr. Bob
>
Posted by dancingstar on February 17, 2006, at 9:53:05
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 2:42:52
DM,
Though my own situation cannot even begin to approach the tragedy that you have experienced, I would be honored to join you in any efforts you choose to take.
One need only go through the experience of taking a drug and not knowing that they are being harmed until much later to know that this is a very serious situation and that others must be spared these tragedies, whether great or small.
Bebe
bebe0217@aol.com
Posted by dancingstar on February 17, 2006, at 10:09:00
In reply to Re: Please be civil, posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 3:00:26
DM,
When I stopped taking Effexor, I was very sick, realized for the first time that I had been ill for the past three years as a result of having taken Effexor, and was overall devastated, furious, and sick beyond all reason.
I found this site on Google and didn't realize that it wasn't exactly a free speech zone. There was no one that actually mentioned to me that they have these rules about how you are allowed to write, and I never understood what I was doing wrong; so I got banned from here a lot, which is fine, really; but what you have to say is important, and I want you to be able to speak as freely as possible. I hope you will take a second to read the rules that GG linked you to, DM, cause I personally do not want the same thing to happen to you. Your words are too precious and important to too many people that do a search for Effexor and read these boards.
Bebe
Posted by dancingstar on February 17, 2006, at 10:22:11
In reply to I beg to differ » lifetime, posted by linkadge on February 16, 2006, at 11:54:17
Link,
I have a question. In England, isn't the newest cautionary warning on Efexor (UK) for people under 30, not just teens? And if it is for people under 30, I have to wonder why it stops there. Why are we not in danger at 31 or 40?
Thanks,
Bebe
Posted by simon levane on February 17, 2006, at 10:30:58
In reply to Re: Please be civil, posted by Devastated Mother on February 17, 2006, at 3:00:26
To All... It is no wonder that there is a high passion here. In truth, those who have not experienced the loss of a child to suicide -- if you have children, THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS THAT YOU ARE NOT AMONG US .... Some parents have actually killed themselves as the final result of this loss.
when we such as DM and myself hear of these notions that we should have researched the drugs, or whatever expression was noted, it wounds us because in the case of DM, there is no way she could have known unless the family doctor had informed her and her family, and in my case, I had the naive belief that no one would prescribe a drug to my daughter that had this high risk without advising me.. and hearing the family doctor had said OK to the pharmacist,, neither of which explained the risk factors to me, nor did the consulting psychiatrist. How could a parent imagine that a drug had such risk?
I would now read every drug prescribed, but in my lifetime, people trusted physicians to do the right thing,, and we never would have imagined that a doctor would prescribe something harmful.
I had the mistaken notion that if three or four different doctors OK'd a drug, how could so many doctors be mistaken.. I have since realized that this happens, and it is because of poor doctor awareness of drug effects and because of their failure to sometimes look at overall medical histories or to share these adequately with other doctors. There is also a tendency for some doctors to simply "get rid" of difficult psychiatric patients without real concern for their future. I have seen this too.. It takes them off the hook but it does not serve the patient. There are appropriate ways for doctors to disengage while offering patients and family members directions for help.
I have paid for my mistake in pain that I would not want to wish on anyone. It never goes away.It is under the surface.. The guilt sometimes eats me up inside. I wish I had died the day my daughter had died. It would have been a whole lot easier.
The issue of the anti-depressants is about reasonable practices of medical care... There is enough literature to show that doctors over-prescribe and for some medications (Ritalin for example), it is altogether too easy for them to just prescribe the pill without consideration of the potential effects or impact. When I read DM's other child getting prescribed Effexor .. WOW.. it is so terrifying and nauseating as to make me want to throw up.. With all the info, this doctor could just say "oh, take this, it will make you feel better... " when the pain and the sadness is there for a reason, and managing this takes a real struggle and help, and compassion and understanding, NOT a drug to make one feel "better" by screwing up brain chemistry.
I would not argue against medication to help people when prescribed with care and with understanding of risks and of the bigger picture, but too often this does not happen..
That is what DM and I are talking about here.
If there is some passion here.. it was not bad language, but the frustration felt when there is either misunderstanding or a lack of understanding of what it really means to suffer the devastation of loss of a family member, and especially of a child when it was PREVENTIBLE....
I am now stuck with all the errors I made with my daughter, many of which happened as a result of her illness and the fact that it was never explained to me properly, and I struggled with her behaviours as she struggled with her life.
I have no doubt whatsoever from what I have read, that the drugs had a major contribution to her death, and most likely, the drugs are what killed her.
SL
> gardengirl,
>
> Fair enough. My intent was not to be uncivil. I will try to be more cautious in the way I express myself. Or leave the site, which may be a better way to go at some point.
>
> While I understand that people think that everyone should be well informed on drugs, the fact is that everyone is not. We all trust our doctors to some extent, and in this case trust was the farthest thing from what we should have done. We had no idea that the drug our son was taking could cause suicide, and I suppose we should have known. So it is our fault. OK.
>
> Perhaps I should share with you exactly how I found out about the danger of the drug. Another of my children lived in the same city as the one who died, and in the face of anxiety and pain over the loss of his dear brother, went to the same doctor for help. He had no history of depression, and in fact was not suffering from the same issues his brother had. He had simply had a great trauma in his life -- he had lost his brother. This doctor prescribed the same lovely effexor for him as well. When I was told this by my son, I questioned him about it, learned the name of the drug, went on the internet and read to my horror the side effects of the drug. The black box was right there for all to see, had we known to look. So I spoke with my other son, and convinced him to go back to the doctor and question the prescription. Her response to him was that this drug would take care of the symptoms. So, I begged my son to stop taking the drug and he did, after a great deal of cajoling on my part. Oh, and after a bizarre episode which was so out of character for him that it could only have been caused by the drug, which in part led to his losing his job. Of course, he then would not go to any doctor for help in his pain over the loss of his brother, so we are dealing with it alone. He is fine, no thanks to this doctor.
>
> So, there you have it. The education of DM. Who trusted a doctor and for trusting that doctor, lost a son.
>
>
> > > If you think your ridiculous words are helping anyone, you are seriously mistaken. ...>
> > > Can you understand this? Are we not being clear? Or is your soapbox too high?
> > >
> >
> > I realize this is a sensitive topic and that emotions can run high, but please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
> >
> > If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
> >
> > http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
> >
> > Follow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should be directed to Admin and should of course themselves be civil.
> >
> > Regards,
> > gg acting as deputy for Dr. Bob
> >
>
>
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