![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
Hello: I'm a 42 y/o male on Lexapro (10 mg) for the past 12 months for depression.
I'm in a situation where I've been put in charge of a small retail business and must deal with both customers and suppliers.
My problem is that I've been unable to become aggressive and assertive when appropriate. I've submitted to the will of others even when my rights are trampled on (at work, socially, etc.). By "aggressive," I mean goal-oriented, non-violent behavior that would allow me to assert myself as a person in front of others.
I've tried Xanax and Ritalin (separately and together). Neither worked.I've also tried other SSRIs in addition to, or in place of, Lexapro. No success.
Your suggestions would be much appreciated. I'm sick and tired of being walked upon.
TheMeekOne
Posted by Phillipa on January 22, 2006, at 22:33:40
In reply to How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
Changint the way you react to things would help and maybe some theraphy to help you learn assestiveness. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Sarah T. on January 22, 2006, at 23:33:59
In reply to How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
What were you like before you started taking Lexapro? The serotonin reuptake inhibitors make me very wimpy, although I meet others who do well on them.
Posted by Declan on January 23, 2006, at 3:05:45
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive? » TheMeekOne, posted by Sarah T. on January 22, 2006, at 23:33:59
Hey, I just feel flippant saying you shoud try Remeron (rage) or Wellbutrin (anxiety and similar).
But you have to run a shop. You have my sympathies. The imperative to be assertive and such is a royal pain. At least I think so.
I like to please. But I'm also angry. It's hard to balance it all.
Declan
Posted by summerflowers on January 23, 2006, at 6:55:37
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by Declan on January 23, 2006, at 3:05:45
No pills can safely make you feel agressive,well not unless you want to also feel suicidal,or homocidal.YOU NEED ASSERTIVNESS TRAINING and the good thing if you find a group or something in your area is that you can help each other.I really feel for you its so understandable,try assertive training.I had a dear friend who owned a dairy,with the same problem.
Posted by nicky847 on January 23, 2006, at 14:04:46
In reply to How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
have you tried hormone replacement therapy? maybe you have low testosterone
Posted by summerflowers on January 23, 2006, at 15:52:15
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by nicky847 on January 23, 2006, at 14:04:46
> have you tried hormone replacement therapy? maybe you have low testosterone
>hey,thats a consideration, you should cheak for that.
Posted by Iansf on January 23, 2006, at 17:14:51
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by summerflowers on January 23, 2006, at 15:52:15
> > have you tried hormone replacement therapy? maybe you have low testosterone
>
> >hey,thats a consideration, you should cheak for that.Let's make that three for checking your testosterone level. High levels of testosterone do tend to correlate with aggressiveness and low levels with timidity. That said, there's no ABSOLUTE correlation. It is possible to have high testosterone levels and be timid or low levels and be assertive, but it's less likely, particularly with the latter. The psych drugs with the greatest potential for increasing assertiveness, unfortunately, are also the ones with greatest potential for abuse - specifically, various forms of speed. I've seen shy people turn into aggressive monsters on crystal meth. At the same time, it's possible something like Adderall could help you by giving a modest boost to overcome inertia; it has potential for abuse, but many people take it for ADHD without problem. A bigger problem might be finding a doctor willing to give it a test. In any case, start with the testosterone check.
Posted by Jakeman on January 23, 2006, at 20:14:44
In reply to How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
I've occasionally used a product called AndroSpray which contains testosterone precusors. Tends to make me a little edgy. I've found it does pick up the sex drive though.
~Jake
Posted by Jakeman on January 23, 2006, at 20:16:54
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by Declan on January 23, 2006, at 3:05:45
> I like to please. But I'm also angry. It's hard to balance it all.
>Me too. I'd make a good surly waiter.
~Jake
Posted by TheMeekOne on January 23, 2006, at 22:25:39
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive? » Declan, posted by Jakeman on January 23, 2006, at 20:16:54
Thank you all for your responses. I'll do a testosterone check (never thought of that). I'll also try Adderall.
Before Lexapro, which I've been taking for about a year now, I was the same in terms of lack of aggressiveness and assertiveness. In fact, I've been that way since childhood. I managed to get by in the adult years because I had a good job in a large private bureaucratic company for about 19 years -- staring almost immediately after college -- until there was a massive consolidation in my section, and I had to quit in December '04. Until that consolidation, my former section was great to work in: there were so many levels of command that no one made any decisions on almost anything without speaking to ten different people both inside the section and with a few other sections -- and typically after long face-to-face meetings or extensive conference calls. In July '05, a sick relative asked me (as I was the only one unemployed or unemployable in the family) to run his retail business that I'm in now, and in which I'm now suffering for lack of assertiveness/aggression. I'm active in the business and always busy; if people are nice, I deal with them well. The problem is dealing with rude, egotistic people. It's not that I don't experience rage at them at all; to the contrary, I'd be steaming inside but for some reason, I can't let it out and tell them, for example, to make up their mind and buy or get out.
I tried behavioral and other therapies in the last few years while I was employed (I knew bad things were coming at the company), and actually I was getting worse. I think that, at this time, pills are my only choice. I really don't care whether or not the pills are going to cause an "unsafe" rage. I need to get the steam out.
I tried Remeron but barely could keep my eyes open while on it, and Wellbutrin made me jumpy.
Sorry for the long post. Appreciate your responses and interest.
TheMeekOne.
Posted by blueberry on January 25, 2006, at 3:22:15
In reply to How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by TheMeekOne on January 22, 2006, at 22:18:19
Just an opinion, but I would try the cheap fast natural route first. Tops on the list would be tyrosine. Approximately 100mg early morning, mid morning, afternoon. If no effect, double the dose. Increase until you get an effect. Too high of a dose could cause jitteriness. Maximum dose is 3000mg a day, but a good target dose would be 500mg to 1000mg a day. If it is to work, it will do so within hours or days instead of weeks. If after one week you don't like it, move on to the meds. But you never know, you might be surprised. It converts to dopamine and norepinephrine.
It's just a natural food molecule found in protein. Three eggs have 833mg tyrosine. Supplements before or between meals gets the tyrosine to do the job better. Also, eat plenty of protein with every meal.
Posted by summerflowers on January 25, 2006, at 5:15:33
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by blueberry on January 25, 2006, at 3:22:15
Another idea is maybe martial arts or kickboxing or something,it is supposed to work on the mind and everything as well.
Posted by Camille Dumont on January 28, 2006, at 22:45:04
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by summerflowers on January 25, 2006, at 5:15:33
I second the martial art training. Try a "hard" style like karate. You will learn how to scream outloud and how to stand up and defend yourself when faced with agression. Of course the goald is not to become physically agressive but to build confidence in yourself to become more assertive.
Posted by jedi on February 1, 2006, at 0:29:29
In reply to Re: How Can I Become Aggressive?, posted by Camille Dumont on January 28, 2006, at 22:45:04
A well known side effect of bupropion(Wellbutrin) is being aggressive and assertive. I have been on the medication several times and it has always had this effect on me for the first couple of weeks. I seriously doubt if this is the kind of assertiveness you are looking for. Do a Google advanced search of dr-bob.org with search terms of Wellbutrin, anger, and aggression. You will see how common this side effect is. Might be worth a short trial just to get the feel of being more aggressive. But then I doubt that a doctor would prescribe the med for this purpose. In closing: Why did I even write this?
Jedi
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Medication | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.