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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by woolav on May 24, 2005, at 21:09:56
During my last hypomania state, i seem to not remember much of what i did. Like, when i read things that i wrote, i dont recall them, or doing things. Could a hypomania episode cause me to not remember doing things? Or is it something else? Am i psychotic now? I feel like I lost my mind during that time. I feel really freaked out by it too. Maybe Ive just finally lost it, and I wonder if i should seek more medical* (what a joke) help or just give up. I dont know anymore.
S
Posted by Larry Hoover on May 24, 2005, at 22:12:30
In reply to Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2???, posted by woolav on May 24, 2005, at 21:09:56
> During my last hypomania state, i seem to not remember much of what i did. Like, when i read things that i wrote, i dont recall them, or doing things. Could a hypomania episode cause me to not remember doing things? Or is it something else? Am i psychotic now? I feel like I lost my mind during that time. I feel really freaked out by it too. Maybe Ive just finally lost it, and I wonder if i should seek more medical* (what a joke) help or just give up. I dont know anymore.
> SThere is a component to memory that can be very important to the ability to recall, the state of mind you were in when the memory was created. That includes both emotional state, and degree of activation (in the sense of mood). You may be totally unable to recall the original situation unless you are in a similar state of mind. It has a name, state-dependent recall. In simple terms, you may have to be hypomanic again to remember, or make sense of, the last episode of hypomania.
You're not crazy. I'd just bet that you're not hypomanic right now.
Lar
Posted by stresser on May 24, 2005, at 22:58:13
In reply to Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2???, posted by woolav on May 24, 2005, at 21:09:56
Don't panic, because we have been there. It will pass, and things will get better. You will look back in the months to come, and see how far you have come. It will be a gratefull feeling, and one that you really don't want to remember. I know I don't.
You aren't alone. BELIEVE ME. I wish I had known that, and I also wish I had know what was happening to me when I was going through it. You do, and that's a step in the right direction. Hang in there, because we are here for you 24/7. You will find the right meds, keep at your doc, and demand the correct medication. You will know it, if it doesn't feel right. Keep us posted...Please!-L
Posted by Phillipa on May 25, 2005, at 18:24:15
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2???, posted by stresser on May 24, 2005, at 22:58:13
I don't think you have to be hypomanic not to remember something. It seems I've always forgotten who someone is or their name. I don't think I'm bipolar but who knows. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Larry Hoover on May 25, 2005, at 22:50:51
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2???, posted by Phillipa on May 25, 2005, at 18:24:15
> I don't think you have to be hypomanic not to remember something. It seems I've always forgotten who someone is or their name. I don't think I'm bipolar but who knows. Fondly, Phillipa
If you're replying to my post, that's not what I meant at all. Names and such are a special sort of memory, coded and retrieved by one specific process. The thing I was talking about, state-dependent learning, is the failure to recall ever having had a specific thought (the example woolav gave, not remembering even writing certain things), or not understanding the significance of the thinking, if it is recalled. It's being unable to identify at all with the internal thought processes.
The same thing can happen with highly emotional memories. You might (sometimes poorly or superficially) remember what happened, but nothing at all about how it felt. However, if you can find yourself in a similar emotional state, all of the intense detail comes back, in concert with the emotional transition.
Lar
Posted by Phillipa on May 25, 2005, at 23:58:07
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2??? » Phillipa, posted by Larry Hoover on May 25, 2005, at 22:50:51
That reminds me of two things. PTSD, and Blackouts. In the case of PTSD, let's say someone was sexually abused as a child. No memory exists. But then when engaging in a sexual act later in life all of a sudden the person feels afraid and doesn't know why. Am I kinda on track? Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by Deneb on May 26, 2005, at 0:54:57
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2??? » Phillipa, posted by Larry Hoover on May 25, 2005, at 22:50:51
> The thing I was talking about, state-dependent learning, is the failure to recall ever having had a specific thought (the example woolav gave, not remembering even writing certain things), or not understanding the significance of the thinking, if it is recalled. It's being unable to identify at all with the internal thought processes.
Wow, is that what happened to me with my wierd posts? I mean, I remember them, but I don't see how I could have ever been in that state of mind and written such things. I just cannot believe I was so "bad" and "sad" at times. I can't imagine myself being that way...how could I have been so desperate?
It must be scary for you woolav to not remember having written certain posts! I hope you find some solutions.
Deneb (u's 2b Shy_Girl)
Posted by Larry Hoover on May 26, 2005, at 17:53:36
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2??? » Larry Hoover, posted by Phillipa on May 25, 2005, at 23:58:07
> That reminds me of two things. PTSD, and Blackouts. In the case of PTSD, let's say someone was sexually abused as a child. No memory exists. But then when engaging in a sexual act later in life all of a sudden the person feels afraid and doesn't know why. Am I kinda on track? Fondly, Phillipa
That's an example, yes. It's not necessarily a pathological process. It's one of the ways our brains all work. In certain situations, the recall process becomes problematic. If it interferes with the quality of life, enjoyment. And, with an absence of clear memory, the answer to "Why is this happening?" can be hard to reveal.
Lar
Posted by Larry Hoover on May 26, 2005, at 18:02:28
In reply to Re: Why dont I remember things-is it really BP2??? » Larry Hoover, posted by Deneb on May 26, 2005, at 0:54:57
> > The thing I was talking about, state-dependent learning, is the failure to recall ever having had a specific thought (the example woolav gave, not remembering even writing certain things), or not understanding the significance of the thinking, if it is recalled. It's being unable to identify at all with the internal thought processes.
>
> Wow, is that what happened to me with my wierd posts?It's a very reasonable explanation. The only persistent evidence you have of how seriously your mood and demeanour changes, is those posts.
> I mean, I remember them, but I don't see how I could have ever been in that state of mind and written such things.
Exactly. But, that state of mind could lead to some rather serious outcomes.
I think that it is really wonderful that you can consider this new way of looking at what happens. You can't remember (when you're feeling more balanced) because you are *so* different, when you have an episode.
> I just cannot believe I was so "bad" and "sad" at times. I can't imagine myself being that way...how could I have been so desperate?
Please understand, you come across as being very sincere about your altered state, when you are in one. Your posts are quite a fair representation of your state of mind. Quite accurate and truthful.
> It must be scary for you woolav to not remember having written certain posts! I hope you find some solutions.
>
> Deneb (u's 2b Shy_Girl)One way to view those altered states, with respect to finding solutions, is to consider them to be places you don't want to go. Like there are neighbourhoods in big cities you just don't want to enter. Recognizing the route you might take to get to one of those neighbourhoods (states of mind), you begin to see when you've begun such a journey. You can intervene. Change the route. Change where you end up.
You don't have to understand them. That's not a requirement for interrupting them.
Lar
This is the end of the thread.
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