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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 25. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
An issue I am having is that after having been out of work on leave, and then returning this week for a short meeting with my boss and the HR guy, it became obvious to me that they don't know what Major Depression is, or what it does to someone. They shrugged it off as if it were more a case of the blues than an illness. Has anyone else experienced anything similar?
Thanks for your input!
Brian
Posted by janejj on June 19, 2003, at 18:09:03
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
Unless someone has been through it themseleves they will never understand, get used to it!
Janejj
Posted by stjames on June 19, 2003, at 18:25:25
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
they don't have to understand it. You have documentation from your doc, that is all they have to understand.
Posted by Rainbowlight on June 19, 2003, at 19:57:33
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
I know how you feel. I have Bipolar and I still haven't found anyone really interested in getting to know exactly what it is. Try to remember that you don't need to justify it to anyone else. The only company and understanding I have found is here on the Internet talking to others that deal with it. Or you might want to join a local group that deals with those suffering from depression, then you won't feel so alone in it.
Posted by McPac on June 19, 2003, at 20:38:29
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by janejj on June 19, 2003, at 18:09:03
"Unless someone has been through it themseleves they will never understand, get used to it!"
>>>>>>>>>>THAT is the cold, hard and SAD truth!!!!!!!
Posted by cubbybear on June 19, 2003, at 22:12:16
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by McPac on June 19, 2003, at 20:38:29
I'm the kind that would make an attempt to educate such people by way of website info--such as what you'd get from the mfr. of Zoloft.There are countless websites that describe the symptoms in easy terms and call it an illness. You can try presenting printouts to the closed-minded or unsympathetic people--it's up to you.
My opinion is, If you can enlighten just ONE individual and make him/her more understanding, then it's worth the effort. On the other hand, if you happen to work with nothing but a bunch of "don't care" people, then to heck with them and concentrate on healing yourself.
Posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 22:37:02
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by cubbybear on June 19, 2003, at 22:12:16
Thanks cubbby for the comments. the problem in my mind (and reality evidently) is that i thought that i worked for such a progressive company. I am fairly well compensated though, and i guess they figure that they cannot take another chance on my getting well this time. i have basically lived and existed in a blurry fog for almost 2 years. I guess like others and you have said, including my therapist and pdoc, concentrate on getting well, and with a healthy brain, I will know what i want to do. thanks again.
Brian
Posted by Sabina on June 20, 2003, at 1:10:47
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
Even my boyfriend still occasionally tells me, "Just relax, honey." My response has become, "If I could 'just relax' then I wouldn't need the medication." I'm having a *very* hard time adjusting to 10mg Lexapro augmented by Xanax. He means well, and I know it has to make him uncomfortable to see me so tweaked, but I just don't like hearing that sort of commentary or simplistic instructions from anyone who hasn't been there.
Posted by brian green on June 20, 2003, at 1:22:20
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by Sabina on June 20, 2003, at 1:10:47
yeah, I agree. the one I love is "why don't you just snap out of it", or "why don't you get a grip?"
Posted by cubbybear on June 20, 2003, at 2:12:01
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » Sabina, posted by brian green on June 20, 2003, at 1:22:20
I once read a great post here from someone who really hit the nail on the head. Basically, it goes like this: In our culture, you'll get attention and sympathy if people can SEE a tangible sign of your suffering, e.g. a cast on your broken leg, a blood-stained handkerchief on your forehead, or stitches. They can readily identify with physical aches and pains and the things we wear or apply to the body to treat those aches and pains. Even a big scratch on your arm with an iodine stain elicits the question, "What happened to your arm?!?" But if the suffering is inside the mind where it is invisible, and/or the other person has never experienced it, there's very little open-mindedness and empathy. In the ultimate form, mental illness becomes a stigma, and when that happens, the so-called "normal" people regard YOU as unsociable, a crybaby, a nutcase.
Supportive family and friends, which I've been fortunate to have, can make all the difference in the world. And I won't forget some wonderful, caring people on this board during my blackest hours.
Posted by McPac on June 20, 2003, at 23:38:52
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by Sabina on June 20, 2003, at 1:10:47
My girlfriend's brother is truly "stupidity personified".......he always makes remarks about people who take meds for mental health reasons, saying they don't really need them.....yet he takes HANDFULS of meds for a hydrocephalus condition! He is incredibly annoying to have to be around for MANY reasons (NEVER shuts up!). I think his brain is somewhere lodged in his rectum, lol.
Posted by Simcha on June 21, 2003, at 3:04:01
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by McPac on June 20, 2003, at 23:38:52
Yeah,
My Mother claims that my depression is no where near as bad as my Brother's and she poo poos my need for medication. Basically my Brother had a very hard bottom with alcoholism and depression where he ended up in the hospital several times. Eventually he ended up in a half-way house, then a 3/4 way house, then a depression support house, and finally he's living in his own section 8 apartment. He's just starting to get his life together after about 3 years after his big bottom.
Since I was able to keep most of the surface things up and I got help much earlier than my Brother, my Mother thinks that my claim of having MDD (varified by a gp and 2 pdocs no less) is just a sham. She's even gone so far as to say, "Well I'm sure that if I went to a Psychiatrist he would give me a diagnosis and medication." Well, to that I did not bite because my Brother and I have been talking about what diagnosis and what medications she needs to be on. She's not so immune from depression herself.
Anyway, basically there is a whole world of people out there who never have to experience the Hell that we have gone through. Some of these people are in their own private Hells and are in denial and have not gotten help. It took me ten years of 12 step programs and talk therapy before I agreed that I needed medication. There is a certain stigma out there to having a mental illness. Unfortunately we have to deal with it.
This is one of the reasons why I'm becoming a Marriage and Family Therapist. I want to help others realize that there is no stigma to having a mental illness and that you must get treatment because these diseases can easily be fatal.
Posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 3:41:24
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by Simcha on June 21, 2003, at 3:04:01
I do think that more people are beginning to understand that depression is a real illness, although of course many still just don't get it. I saw the results of a large survey recently (sorry, can't find the link) in which people were asked something like "Do you believe that major depression is a real illness that should be treated with medication"? A large proportion of people (around half, as I recall) said yes; this was compared to a survey from several years ago in which the vast majority of people said no.
About 12 years ago, when I started Prozac (not a very good drug for me, but that's another story), I was a graduate student. I confided to some other students and faculty members that I was taking it, and suddenly people started saying "hey, me too --but please don't tell anyone". It was almost like a secret society of AD users.
Not long ago, I was chatting with an administrative assistant in a major office at the university where I work. She complained about sleeping problems and anxiety, and we quickly got into a discussion of various meds that we'd used. She then added, well so-and-so (in the office) suffers from depression; she tried Zoloft but does better with Paxil, but then this other guy prefers Wellbutrin, but then Dr. so-and so prefers Celexa...etc. etc. It seemed like half the people there were on psychiatric meds and quite happy to talk about it. And, some of my colleagues will now say things like, "sorry if I'm a little weird; I just increased my dose of Prozac".
Maybe this is unusual, but a lot of the stigma seems to be lifting, at least among the people I interact with. I hope this trend continues!
Posted by brian green on June 21, 2003, at 5:02:08
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by Simcha on June 21, 2003, at 3:04:01
simcha, you sound as if you have had a lot of experience in the md area just in your own home, unfortunately. I am the first, but my family all understands what it is. I made sure they knew what, when, and where of it. Got a couple of close friend, one who has had it, and another who tries to understand. Sadly, my large family oriented corporation which is progressive in every other way does not. They think I have been just sluffing off and getting by on their dollar. They don't realize the days after days I could not raise my head, open my eyes. and the day when i could make it into work, that i walked around in a fog, saying yes and no to i didn't know what. I am so glad that part it over.
>Yeah,
>
> My Mother claims that my depression is no where near as bad as my Brother's and she poo poos my need for medication. Basically my Brother had a very hard bottom with alcoholism and depression where he ended up in the hospital several times. Eventually he ended up in a half-way house, then a 3/4 way house, then a depression support house, and finally he's living in his own section 8 apartment. He's just starting to get his life together after about 3 years after his big bottom.
>
> Since I was able to keep most of the surface things up and I got help much earlier than my Brother, my Mother thinks that my claim of having MDD (varified by a gp and 2 pdocs no less) is just a sham. She's even gone so far as to say, "Well I'm sure that if I went to a Psychiatrist he would give me a diagnosis and medication." Well, to that I did not bite because my Brother and I have been talking about what diagnosis and what medications she needs to be on. She's not so immune from depression herself.
>
> Anyway, basically there is a whole world of people out there who never have to experience the Hell that we have gone through. Some of these people are in their own private Hells and are in denial and have not gotten help. It took me ten years of 12 step programs and talk therapy before I agreed that I needed medication. There is a certain stigma out there to having a mental illness. Unfortunately we have to deal with it.
>
> This is one of the reasons why I'm becoming a Marriage and Family Therapist. I want to help others realize that there is no stigma to having a mental illness and that you must get treatment because these diseases can easily be fatal.
Posted by brian green on June 21, 2003, at 5:07:26
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression, posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 3:41:24
I am excited to hear that. You are obviously not in the deep south where everything is a little slower.
Posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 5:26:58
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » Viridis, posted by brian green on June 21, 2003, at 5:07:26
Well, I am in Texas, which is pretty deep...
Posted by brian green on June 21, 2003, at 5:33:56
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » brian green, posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 5:26:58
you're right, and hot too, huh. I have friends in Galveston that are from here. Tell me V, and I am sorry that I don't recall, what were the circumstances that led you to the website?
> Well, I am in Texas, which is pretty deep...
Posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 6:52:20
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » Viridis, posted by brian green on June 21, 2003, at 5:33:56
Hi Brian,
I started lurking here a couple of years ago, when it became obvious that my current GP (like previous ones) didn't have a clue about how to treat mental illness. I was having panic attacks, major depression, and on top of that I seem to have mild ADD (perhaps the root of the problem?). I had extremely negative reactions to various "standard" ADs and was getting pretty discouraged.
After years of the wrong meds, I finally found a really good psychiatrist, and I began posting around the time that things started improving. There was a lot of tweaking involved, and some ideas came from here. We're still tweaking, but I'm doing a lot better, though not perfect.
My pdoc has become interested in "internet medicine", and asked me on my last visit which websites I recommend. Naturally, I suggested this one. I hope he joins -- I've never met a doctor of any kind with better intuition. And, although he's 60 years old, he's only been a psychiatrist for a few years -- before that, he was a GP (which he said he got bored with, so trained in psychiatry when in his 50s), and before that he was an English professor at a major university.
Anyway, I consider myself much better, but am always looking for ideas to improve further. Plus, I like to share my experiences with others, since I know how it feels to be in the depths of depression and/or anxiety. I realize that what works for me won't necessarily work for others, but at least I can make suggestions. And, as a research biologist, I think I'm reasonably able to explain how some of these meds work (although I'm certainly no expert!).
So, that's my story -- what's yours?
Posted by Geezer on June 21, 2003, at 21:39:37
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
> An issue I am having is that after having been out of work on leave, and then returning this week for a short meeting with my boss and the HR guy, it became obvious to me that they don't know what Major Depression is, or what it does to someone. They shrugged it off as if it were more a case of the blues than an illness. Has anyone else experienced anything similar?
> Thanks for your input!
> BrianYup but it doesn't bother me any more......just tell them your "little case of the blues" has a 15-20% mortality rate. Then be reassuring....."I am only a danger to myself - no one else". I usually leave it at that and take the dog for a walk - I like the dog better than most people anyhow.
Geezer
Posted by McPac on June 22, 2003, at 0:09:09
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » brian green, posted by Geezer on June 21, 2003, at 21:39:37
I usually leave it at that and take the dog for a walk - I like the dog better than most people anyhow.
>>>>>>>>>>>I hear ya!!!!
Posted by McPac on June 22, 2003, at 0:13:25
In reply to Re: People not understanding Major Depression » brian green, posted by Viridis on June 21, 2003, at 5:26:58
Did AD's like Prozac seem to make you WORSE?
One Dr. says that patients that get worse from ssri's can take Buspar, and that the Buspar will block that effect and allow them to take the ssri. Have you ever heard of this idea? I'm seriously wondering if it really works.
Posted by Sabina on June 22, 2003, at 0:34:39
In reply to Viridis/Anybody, understanding Major Depression, posted by McPac on June 22, 2003, at 0:13:25
All four AD's I have tried so far have all made me much, much worse. I've been so good trying to stick with the Lexapro for almost three weeks, but I'm a basket case. I'm truly happy for those who have had positive results and I really hoped that Lex would be "the one" for me, but I am planning to discuss trying Buspar with my doc on July 7th appt. Let me know if you try it, and I'd love anyother input as well on the subject. Maybe I/we should just start a new post because I can't take much more of this.
Posted by Viridis on June 22, 2003, at 0:56:53
In reply to Re: Viridis/Anybody, understanding Major Depression » McPac, posted by Sabina on June 22, 2003, at 0:34:39
Hi Sabina,
Some people (like me) just can't tolerate SSRI antidepressants, even though they're in vogue for now. I haven't tried Buspar, but my impression is that only a small subset of people respond well to it. There are all sorts of other drugs out there, and you're bound to find one or a combo that works. Are you seeing a psychiatrist or GP/family doctor? Psychiatrists (good ones, at least), are more likely to work outside the box, which sounds like the approach you need. The real key is to find someone you can relate to, who's willing to try different things. This may be hard, but it's well worth the time and effort.
Posted by Dr. Bob on June 22, 2003, at 14:33:29
In reply to People not understanding Major Depression, posted by brian green on June 19, 2003, at 18:06:22
> An issue I am having is that after having been out of work on leave, and then returning this week for a short meeting with my boss and the HR guy, it became obvious to me that they don't know what Major Depression is, or what it does to someone...
This is a great discussion, but I'd like it to redirect it to Psycho-Social-Babble. Here's a link:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030617/msgs/236054.html
Thanks,
Bob
Posted by McPac on June 22, 2003, at 23:29:37
In reply to Re: Viridis/Anybody, understanding Major Depression » McPac, posted by Sabina on June 22, 2003, at 0:34:39
"but I am planning to discuss trying Buspar with my doc on July 7th appt. Let me know if you try it, and I'd love anyother input as well on the subject. Maybe I/we should just start a new post because I can't take much more of this".
>>>>>>>>>>>>I started a new post! This one pdoc said that slowly adding Buspar does the trick....he also mentions that IF you feel sick from the Buspar that a little Remeron will help that! Take care and ask your pdoc if he knows about the Buspar idea!
This is the end of the thread.
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