Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 20698

Shown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Serzone...will this help me?

Posted by harry b. on February 7, 2000, at 16:39:28

I am very alone, very lonely. I've had one friend for
several years who has invited me into his family,
holiday dinners, etc. I've become 'addicted' to him,
to the point that this weekend he advised me to back
off a little, that he can't handle being needed. This
conversation occurred just after I told him that I
was seeing a psychologist for depression and anxiety.
Needless to say, his reaction has increased my depres-
sion and anxiety. I'm pretty distraught right now. I
even drafted a suicide letter. I called my psych today
but he can't see me until next week.

Has anyone become so dependent on or addicted to a
friend that no other people or activities can shake
the obsession? How is it dealt with?

I began taking Serzone last week, have noticed no
respite from the obsession, depression, or anxiety.

 

Re: Serzone...will this help me?

Posted by Noa on February 7, 2000, at 17:58:46

In reply to Serzone...will this help me?, posted by harry b. on February 7, 2000, at 16:39:28

Harry,

Three thoughts:
1. Be aware that Serzone can take a few weeks to feel like it works. And, some people have felt worse at first, before feeling better, with agitation and feelings of rage.

2. Did you tell your therapist you were having serious suicidal thinking and even drafted a letter? I think you should let him know this. If he cannot see you, you can go to the emergency room to be evaluated.

3. You have suffered a loss, with your friend pulling away. I think a lot of us know what it is like to feel very needy, and to depend on one person a lot. But maybe you need to find a wider base of support.

Glad you posted here. Use the support of all the great folks on this board.

 

Re: Serzone...will this help me?

Posted by Cindy W on February 7, 2000, at 21:36:57

In reply to Re: Serzone...will this help me?, posted by Noa on February 7, 2000, at 17:58:46

> Harry,
>
> Three thoughts:
> 1. Be aware that Serzone can take a few weeks to feel like it works. And, some people have felt worse at first, before feeling better, with agitation and feelings of rage.
>
> 2. Did you tell your therapist you were having serious suicidal thinking and even drafted a letter? I think you should let him know this. If he cannot see you, you can go to the emergency room to be evaluated.
>
> 3. You have suffered a loss, with your friend pulling away. I think a lot of us know what it is like to feel very needy, and to depend on one person a lot. But maybe you need to find a wider base of support.
>
> Glad you posted here. Use the support of all the great folks on this board.

harry b, I agree with the three comments posted by Noa! Having taken Serzone, I found it very helpful, but it took a couple of weeks to really make a difference in my mood. Also, she is right that you should tell your psychologist immediately that you are having suicidal urges. The reliance on one friend is understandable; it's hard when this friend can't meet all your needs. Please feel free to use the online support people here until you can broaden your social circle, and call your psychologist! Having felt suicidal before myself, I know that it is compelling, but also that the urges will pass and later you will be glad you asked for help.--Cindy W

 

Harry, you can do this

Posted by bigbertha on February 7, 2000, at 23:43:39

In reply to Serzone...will this help me?, posted by harry b. on February 7, 2000, at 16:39:28

> I am very alone, very lonely.
Harry-
You are never alone if you stay in touch with
all the wonderful and wacky (in the best way!)
people who make up this site. We REALLY care
because most of us have been in your shoes at one
time. Are you currently employed and does your
employer offer something like EAP (Employee
Assistance Program) where you could speak with
a licensed social worker or similar if your
psychologist(?) can't/won't? If not, please check
your local phone directory for "hotline" numbers.
You need to stay connected.

> I began taking Serzone last week, have noticed no
> respite from the obsession, depression, or anxiety.

The other posters are correct about meds such as
Serzone that don't give "immediate" relief. But your
post makes me wonder if you have "social phobia" and
might also require a benzo (eg, diazepam, lorazepam, etc),
to help with the anxiety while waiting for the other
med(s) to kick in.
Please keep in touch.
bb

 

Re: Harry, you can do this

Posted by harry b. on February 8, 2000, at 12:00:06

In reply to Harry, you can do this, posted by bigbertha on February 7, 2000, at 23:43:39

> > I am very alone, very lonely.
> Harry-
> You are never alone if you stay in touch with
> all the wonderful and wacky (in the best way!)
> people who make up this site. We REALLY care
> because most of us have been in your shoes at one
> time.

The board is good, glad I found it. It seems to
offer some support & guidance, BUT it can't
provide a hug or smile or a soothing voice or a
pair of eyes that reflect acceptance and care.

> Are you currently employed and does your
> employer offer something like EAP (Employee
> Assistance Program) where you could speak with
> a licensed social worker or similar if your
> psychologist(?) can't/won't? If not, please check
> your local phone directory for "hotline" numbers.
> You need to stay connected.

I'm employed. But I have been taking a lot of days
off. I did not go in yesterday or today. So, my
job, a pretty good one, is in jeopardy. I don't
know anything about EAP. I have short & long
term disability insurance but my psych insists I
try to keep working. Problem is, if I continue
the abscences I'll lose my job & my health insur-
ance. Then I will be lost.

> But your
> post makes me wonder if you have "social phobia" and
> might also require a benzo (eg, diazepam, lorazepam, etc),
> to help with the anxiety while waiting for the other
> med(s) to kick in.
> Please keep in touch.
> bb

Don't know anything about benzos. Will ask my
psych about them. Social phobia? I'm not afraid to
be out, but it's true I don't socialize. Haven't
had a date or been with a group, except my friend
and his family (don't know if our friendship exists
now) for 12 years.

Thanks for your response.


 

Re: Harry, you can do this

Posted by Cass on February 8, 2000, at 19:51:39

In reply to Re: Harry, you can do this, posted by harry b. on February 8, 2000, at 12:00:06

Harry,
I have had a similar experience with a friend. We clicked immediately: I felt extremely validated and understood by her. It is easy to become "addicted" to that feeling when you have had little of that in life. I needed to talk to her everytime the most insignificant thing happened to me. I became too dependent, and she became defensive. Fortunately, I was able to maintain the friendship by detaching myself from her enough to give her her space back. I did this by keeping busy and broadening my social circle. College classes are great for that. Also, community activities, i.e. volunteering or involvement in a church. Or if you like to read, you could start a book club. Did your friend cut off the friendship all together, or did he just pull away? Then again, if he was narrow-minded or cruel about your treatment of depression, perhaps you are overrating his support (I know that is hard to think about objectively when you miss some one and feel lonely.) I hope that he is a good friend, and that you can maintain the relationship.
Cass

 

Re: Harry, you can do this

Posted by Cindy W on February 8, 2000, at 21:54:15

In reply to Re: Harry, you can do this, posted by Cass on February 8, 2000, at 19:51:39

> Harry,
> I have had a similar experience with a friend. We clicked immediately: I felt extremely validated and understood by her. It is easy to become "addicted" to that feeling when you have had little of that in life. I needed to talk to her everytime the most insignificant thing happened to me. I became too dependent, and she became defensive. Fortunately, I was able to maintain the friendship by detaching myself from her enough to give her her space back. I did this by keeping busy and broadening my social circle. College classes are great for that. Also, community activities, i.e. volunteering or involvement in a church. Or if you like to read, you could start a book club. Did your friend cut off the friendship all together, or did he just pull away? Then again, if he was narrow-minded or cruel about your treatment of depression, perhaps you are overrating his support (I know that is hard to think about objectively when you miss some one and feel lonely.) I hope that he is a good friend, and that you can maintain the relationship.
> Cass
harry, hope you enjoy this virtual hug and smile.--Cindy W (formerly of the 2000 guinea pigs, and now lots of treefrogs)

 

Re: Harry, you can do this

Posted by Noa on February 9, 2000, at 1:39:13

In reply to Re: Harry, you can do this, posted by Cindy W on February 8, 2000, at 21:54:15

Another goo way to occupy yourself is to do volunteer work. I know it sounds trite. But I have found that it helps me a lot.

 

Re: Harry, you can do this To Cass & Cindy W

Posted by harry b. on February 11, 2000, at 21:53:25

In reply to Re: Harry, you can do this, posted by Cindy W on February 8, 2000, at 21:54:15

Hi Cass & Cindy,

I just found your replies, they had been placed
in the previous posts sections.

Thank you Cass for sharing your experience and for
your advice. My opinion is that my friend pulled
way back. Can it be salvaged? I don't know. Right
now it looks unlikely.

Thank you Cindy for the hug & smile. I love hugs
and smiles.


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