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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 26 to 50 of 82. Go back in thread:
Posted by obsidian on November 9, 2010, at 20:55:26
In reply to My theory on why I love Dr. Bob, posted by Deneb on November 8, 2010, at 21:05:45
as I see it, because there was some objectivity in it....
an exploration of the 'why' with a recognition of some pattern, that leads to understanding
I often get uncomfortable with the "love" posts
I hate how much I can get attached. I often don't want to be that person. I know a lot about imaginary friends too.
Posted by Solstice on November 9, 2010, at 21:07:03
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » Solstice, posted by glydin50 on November 9, 2010, at 17:31:54
> ~~~ I appreciate your additional info. Generally, I avoid giving attention except rarely when I feel as if I would like my feelings known. I have asked Dr. Bob to at least revisit his stance from time to time. As 10er's post addressed, I admit to feeling silenced because of a number of factors. It's a "Handle like a rotten egg" topic that requires wordsmithing.... : )
>
> I understand others are not bothered. I accept that. I also accept my dislikes are not going to cause any policy changes. No one has to agree w/ me but I would like to have my privledge to post my feelings just as other posters can post their feelings.
I understand, Glydin. It can be hard when we feel strongly about an issue and our position isn't favored by the majority.. especially if we genuinely have legitimate points supporting our view. In my life, I've spent my share of time in that spot, and no doubt I'll be there again and again.And you do have the privilege of posting your feelings... I haven't seen anyone step in to tell you that you can't. Maybe the tricky part is that when we (at least for me) feel strongly, we want those who don't agree to see the legitimacy of our position, and we hope they will modify their view to fit ours more closely. When that doesn't happen, that's where we might feel we stand alone.. unheard. And I guess as far as Psychobabble goes, I think you can probably count on this particular issue not changing. It might be a 'cause' worth laying down. I know it's not about how you feel about Deneb. I've seen you be very generous-spirited and kind to Deneb during struggles she's shared with the community.
For myself, along the way (of life) I've adopted a few 'policies' (for lack of a better word) to help deal with things I'm not crazy about. One of them is that if there is something going on that I don't like and I can't change it or get away from it, I try to find a way to 'hold hands' with it.. to even make a friend out of what's chaffing me. That takes me into a mindset of figuring out a way to perceive it that allows me to co-exist with something I can't get rid of so it doesn't irritate me.
I do realize that somewhere this situation is chaffing you, but as for me, Deneb's postings about her love for Dr. Bob have never bothered me. To be sure, it's unusual. It's also very 'young,' whimsical... innocent. The butterfly image I have of her when she makes her Dr.Bob-love posts... it's a tentative little thing... it will land somewhere briefly to open its wings and share, then off it flies.. we don't know when it will pop in again.. but it is easily startled. The whimsy of it always leaves me smiling. I've been impressed with how much clarity Deneb has about the fantasy-nature of it. She knows it's not 'real.' That's why it doesn't cause me to worry. She enjoys feeling attached to him, it provides her a sense of safety and connection. She's clear about how much it helps her cope - and although maybe it's not as mature of a way to cope as what you might like for yourself, she is genuinely at peace with it. I'm just sharing my own musings... take what you like if you find something in there helpful to you..
Solstice
Posted by Glydin50 on November 9, 2010, at 21:28:27
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » glydin50, posted by Solstice on November 9, 2010, at 21:07:03
Your post was so kind. I am thankful and overwhelmed. Thank you !!!!
Posted by Free on November 9, 2010, at 22:13:33
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » glydin50, posted by Solstice on November 9, 2010, at 21:07:03
Solstice,
You would make an excellent CB - Civility Buddy. You've softened me with this post.
I think you just set the bar, Solstice. Nice. :)
>
>
> I understand, Glydin. It can be hard when we feel strongly about an issue and our position isn't favored by the majority.. especially if we genuinely have legitimate points supporting our view. In my life, I've spent my share of time in that spot, and no doubt I'll be there again and again.
>
> And you do have the privilege of posting your feelings... I haven't seen anyone step in to tell you that you can't. Maybe the tricky part is that when we (at least for me) feel strongly, we want those who don't agree to see the legitimacy of our position, and we hope they will modify their view to fit ours more closely. When that doesn't happen, that's where we might feel we stand alone.. unheard. And I guess as far as Psychobabble goes, I think you can probably count on this particular issue not changing. It might be a 'cause' worth laying down. I know it's not about how you feel about Deneb. I've seen you be very generous-spirited and kind to Deneb during struggles she's shared with the community.
>
> For myself, along the way (of life) I've adopted a few 'policies' (for lack of a better word) to help deal with things I'm not crazy about. One of them is that if there is something going on that I don't like and I can't change it or get away from it, I try to find a way to 'hold hands' with it.. to even make a friend out of what's chaffing me. That takes me into a mindset of figuring out a way to perceive it that allows me to co-exist with something I can't get rid of so it doesn't irritate me.
>
> I do realize that somewhere this situation is chaffing you, but as for me, Deneb's postings about her love for Dr. Bob have never bothered me. To be sure, it's unusual. It's also very 'young,' whimsical... innocent. The butterfly image I have of her when she makes her Dr.Bob-love posts... it's a tentative little thing... it will land somewhere briefly to open its wings and share, then off it flies.. we don't know when it will pop in again.. but it is easily startled. The whimsy of it always leaves me smiling. I've been impressed with how much clarity Deneb has about the fantasy-nature of it. She knows it's not 'real.' That's why it doesn't cause me to worry. She enjoys feeling attached to him, it provides her a sense of safety and connection. She's clear about how much it helps her cope - and although maybe it's not as mature of a way to cope as what you might like for yourself, she is genuinely at peace with it. I'm just sharing my own musings... take what you like if you find something in there helpful to you..
>
> Solstice
>
>
>
>
>
>
Posted by Solstice on November 9, 2010, at 23:20:41
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » Solstice, posted by Free on November 9, 2010, at 22:13:33
> Solstice,
>
> You've softened me with this post.:-) Free, maybe my sharing just tapped into something that was really already there...
Posted by Glydin50 on November 9, 2010, at 21:28:27> Your post was so kind. I am thankful and overwhelmed. Thank you !!!!
My pleasure, Glydin.. There are an awful lot of really good hearts in this place.. yours.. Free's... lots of them..
Solstice
Posted by Deneb on November 9, 2010, at 23:39:58
In reply to Re: My theory, posted by Dr. Bob on November 9, 2010, at 19:39:10
> What do posts about hate have to do with the administration of this web site? Their Dr. Bob is imaginary, too. Their current version of Grrr Grrr.
>
> BobLOL You're SO funny! :-)
Posted by Dinah on November 10, 2010, at 0:16:32
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » Solstice, posted by Free on November 9, 2010, at 22:13:33
> Solstice,
>
> You would make an excellent CB - Civility Buddy. You've softened me with this post.If you'd be interested, Solstice, let me know. Being newish doesn't matter, so long as you have seen enough of Dr. Bob's admin actions to have an understanding of the guidelines. Or at least to know to ask for further clarification if you need it. If you've read the archives, that counts.
Glydin, Free, would you be interested?
Posted by Glydin50 on November 10, 2010, at 9:48:04
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.., posted by Dinah on November 10, 2010, at 0:16:32
I appreciate having my feelings on this not making for any overstepping of the guidelines. I also appreciate the kindnesses extended. Having had my say and the ability for that expression should hold me for about another year... Seems to be an annual need for me : )
Posted by PartlyCloudy on November 10, 2010, at 11:45:06
In reply to Thanks, posted by Glydin50 on November 10, 2010, at 9:48:04
> I appreciate having my feelings on this not making for any overstepping of the guidelines. I also appreciate the kindnesses extended. Having had my say and the ability for that expression should hold me for about another year... Seems to be an annual need for me : )
I still carry a mighty weight.
Posted by ed_uk2010 on November 10, 2010, at 14:17:32
In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by PartlyCloudy on November 10, 2010, at 11:45:06
My theory is that Deneb will continue to post about her love for the (imaginary version of) Dr. Bob until she finds someone to love in real life.
What do you think Deneb? True?
Posted by ed_uk2010 on November 10, 2010, at 14:43:36
In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by PartlyCloudy on November 10, 2010, at 11:45:06
So... will it be:
http://media.photobucket.com/image/paul+rudd/brycew_09/paul-rudd.jpg
Or:
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/3x2wHUIZRi5/Amanda+Harrington+Jennifer+Ellison+David+Gest/-eeOXf8FyYr
Posted by 10derheart on November 10, 2010, at 15:03:51
In reply to Finding a new man for Deneb, posted by ed_uk2010 on November 10, 2010, at 14:43:36
Oh my.
yikes.
Posted by Lou Pilder on November 10, 2010, at 15:04:15
In reply to My theory on Deneb's love for Dr. Bob, posted by ed_uk2010 on November 10, 2010, at 14:17:32
> My theory is that Deneb will continue to post about her love for the (imaginary version of) Dr. Bob until she finds someone to love in real life.
>
> What do you think Deneb? True?ed_uk2010,
You wrote,[...until she finds xxxxxxx to yyy in rxxx lyyy...].
I am unsure as to what you are wanting to mean here. If you could post answers to the following, then I could have the opportunity to respond accordingly.
1A. Is there a post by Deneb here that states that in her real life she has xx yyy to zzzz?
2A. If so, could you post the link to such?
1B. If there is not a post of the nature in question here, what criteria did you use to make the statement that [(until she finds) sxxx oyy to lzzz in RL]?
2B. redacted by respondent
Lou
Posted by Glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 0:23:14
In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by PartlyCloudy on November 10, 2010, at 11:45:06
> I still carry a mighty weight.
>
>~~~ : ( Aw... I'm sorry for that. I am 99.9% sure I am never going to like it. I am equally sure there won't be any changes forthcoming. Once I have repeated myself several times about once per year, I TRY to let it go. I am an infrequent poster these past few years :)
Posted by Deneb on November 11, 2010, at 0:30:51
In reply to Re: » PartlyCloudy, posted by Glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 0:23:14
Hey Glydin,
I'm just curious, do you want to see me blocked for posting my love bob posts?
Do you and others want to punish me for my posts?
Just wondering.
Deneb
Posted by Solstice on November 11, 2010, at 1:46:43
In reply to Re:, posted by Deneb on November 11, 2010, at 0:30:51
> Posted by Glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 0:23:14
> In reply to Re: Thanks, posted by PartlyCloudy on November 10, 2010, at 11:45:06
>
> I still carry a mighty weight. PC
>
>> ~~~ : ( Aw... I'm sorry for that. I am 99.9% sure I am never going to like it. I am equally sure there won't be any changes forthcoming. Once I have repeated myself several times about once per year, I TRY to let it go. I am an infrequent poster these past few years :) Glydin50
>
When I saw this post, I was worried it might make Deneb feel bad.. unwelcome...
Deneb's response:> Hey Glydin,
>
> I'm just curious, do you want to see me blocked for posting my love bob posts?
>
> Do you and others want to punish me for my posts?
>
> Just wondering.
>
> Deneb
Deneb is wondering if people here want to punish her, that they might want her to be blocked. That would feel very bad to me, to feel like others wished I would go away. Seems my worry had merit. I don't want Deneb to feel bad. To me, her love-Bob posts are like the beautiful little butterflies that grace our world.Solstice
Posted by PartlyCloudy on November 11, 2010, at 6:40:47
In reply to Re:, posted by Solstice on November 11, 2010, at 1:46:43
No, not at all. To me, it's not Deneb who is at fault here. I've made that clear in my communications with the administration.
pc
Posted by glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 7:47:56
In reply to Re:, posted by Deneb on November 11, 2010, at 0:30:51
> Hey Glydin,
>
> I'm just curious, do you want to see me blocked for posting my love bob posts?~~~ No, I do not.
>
> Do you and others want to punish me for my posts?
>~~~ Can only speak for myself but no, I don't want you punished.
> Just wondering.
>
> Deneb~~~ I hope you aren't wondering any longer. I'll answer any further questions you would have for me.
Posted by glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 8:21:52
In reply to Re:, posted by Solstice on November 11, 2010, at 1:46:43
> When I saw this post, I was worried it might make Deneb feel bad.. unwelcome...
>~~~ If that is the case and those feelings are being felt by Deneb, I can relate as I am experiencing those feelings as well for voicing my feelings.
Posted by Deneb on November 11, 2010, at 10:00:58
In reply to Re: » Deneb, posted by glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 7:47:56
OK, thanks for explaining Glydin.
Posted by Glydin50 on November 11, 2010, at 11:25:15
In reply to Re: » glydin50, posted by Deneb on November 11, 2010, at 10:00:58
Again, if there are any other questions/info that could lead to maybe a clearer understanding, I welcome them.
IMO, folks don't have to agree to be respectful to the feelings and needs of others. Giving voice to how I feel is important to me as well as I believe it to be important to you.
Posted by sigismund on November 11, 2010, at 13:07:52
In reply to Re:, posted by Solstice on November 11, 2010, at 1:46:43
I was wondering (as you do when you're half asleep) whether or not someone might feel put down believing that someone somewhere wanted to punish them.
Posted by fayeroe on November 11, 2010, at 13:27:35
In reply to Re:, posted by Solstice on November 11, 2010, at 1:46:43
Posted by sigismund on November 11, 2010, at 14:36:56
In reply to Re:, posted by sigismund on November 11, 2010, at 13:07:52
>I was wondering (as you do when you're half asleep) whether or not someone might feel put down believing that someone somewhere wanted to punish them.
That's nothing compared to what I could do if I tried.
Isn't that what the Duchess says?And what about Leonard Cohen....
'It's lonely here, there's no one left to torture'?
Posted by ed_uk2010 on November 11, 2010, at 15:02:10
In reply to Lou's request-uhntllscheighphyndz » ed_uk2010, posted by Lou Pilder on November 10, 2010, at 15:04:15
>I am unsure as to what you are wanting to mean here. If you could post answers to the following, then I could have the opportunity to respond accordingly.
> 1A. Is there a post by Deneb here that states that in her real life she has xx yyy to zzzz?
> 2A. If so, could you post the link to such?
> 1B. If there is not a post of the nature in question here, what criteria did you use to make the statement that [(until she finds) sxxx oyy to lzzz in RL]?
> 2B. redacted by respondent
> Lou
Lou, I am unsure as to what you are wanting to mean in your entire post. It is about as clear as a cryptic crossword.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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