Psycho-Babble Administration Thread 596210

Shown: posts 148 to 172 of 272. Go back in thread:

Re: sharks

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:07:01

In reply to Re: feeling uncomfortable » Dr. Bob, posted by Toph on January 21, 2006, at 11:46:37

> > IMO, however, the larger the community, the greater the potential disruption.
>
> And IMO the larger the community, the greater the community's ability to handle such disruptions through such dynamics as peer pressure, conformity, social norms, etc.
I disagree that dynamics are sufficient. They help, but aren't always enough even in small groups that meet in person.
> >You see bigger waves in an ocean than in a bathtub.
>
> I love it when you wax poetic Bob. You also see a greater variety of sea life in an ocean than in a bathtub. I'd rather be in an ocean with a shark than in a bathtub with one.
Me, too! :-)
IMO, an online ocean is different from a real ocean. Because it's more connected. The sea life can support each other more easily, but they're less safe from sharks, too.
Anyway, I think a question is whether it's possible to have the best of both worlds, the diversity of an ocean and the safety of a bathtub. Not as diverse as an ocean or as safe as a bathtub, but a mix of the two.
> > it can be hard to make everyone happy. If they're looking for big waves, maybe they've come to the wrong place?
>
> I come to Psycho-Babble not to agitate but rather to associate with others like myself.
With sharks?
> It disappoints me greatly that this is more like an aquarium with select fish than a mental health ocean
If someone's looking for sharks, maybe they also have come to the wrong place.
> > > My struggles with authority go deep
> >
> > It's an interesting question, why people stay somewhere they feel uncomfortable. What is it they hope to gain?
>
> I stayed here because of two main reasons, 1) because after managing to control my bipolar illness with medication I sort of denied my chronic mental illness identity for years which I rediscovered here. I enjoyed coming out of the closet, if you will.
Coming out of the closet *and* being accepted. Maybe some people stay, even though they feel uncomfortable, because they hope for acceptance. They see how accepting in general it is here.
And others know what it's like to be rejected. To be treated like a shark. So they empathize.
> 2) I have met some fascinating people here (I'd include you in that group, but I think that intriguing would be more apropos adjective for you). Maybe I'm wrong, but I do not think I am here to fight, my deep authority issues notwithstanding.
Maybe some are here to defend. Maybe to them I'm the alpha shark. Maybe they accept feeling uncomfortable because they consider it to be for a good cause.
Bob

Re: Grief board

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:56:32

In reply to Re: Can we work together to figure out what to do?, posted by Dr. Bob on January 9, 2006, at 1:55:32

> > if Grief, for example, had evolved into a board where Grief was an active topic with a group of people seeking to explore the grieving process it makes sense. But if grief is just somewhere you're redirected to if a family member or friend dies and you seek to share it with your community, then it's just isolating.
>
> I have to agree ... Maybe it's just not going to work as a separate board
So what if we keep it available, but automatically redirect any new posts to Social?
Bob

Jets » Dr. Bob

Posted by Toph on January 21, 2006, at 18:17:36

In reply to Re: sharks, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:07:01

> >
> > I come to Psycho-Babble not to agitate but rather to associate with others like myself.
>
> With sharks?

I realize that the shark metaphor was mine, but I think you know I was speaking abstractly about posters who disrupt. Do you really think of me as a shark? Though I may have bitten a few people, I am hardly a predatory killer that others fear here. God, at least I hope not.
> ...Maybe some people stay, even though they feel uncomfortable, because they hope for acceptance. They see how accepting in general it is here.
Yes, acceptance, that's important to me. And Babble is indeed a place where acceptance is commonplace.

> And others know what it's like to be rejected. To be treated like a shark. So they empathize.
I'm too far down the food chain to understand this one. Maybe someone else can interpret for me.
>
> Maybe some are here to defend. Maybe to them I'm the alpha shark. Maybe they accept feeling uncomfortable because they consider it to be for a good cause.
>
> Bob
You are alpha shark, Bob (so how's that T-shirt project coming?). And Babble is a good cause.
Toph

Re: sharks » Dr. Bob

Posted by ClearSkies on January 21, 2006, at 20:47:36

In reply to Re: sharks, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:07:01

:-o !!!
Bob talks!
How very wonderful to see.
ClearSkies

Toph is a shark???? » Dr. Bob

Posted by Deneb on January 21, 2006, at 21:07:04

In reply to Re: sharks, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:07:01

Hey Dr. Bob, do you think Toph is a shark??
I wouldn't want to be called a shark Dr. Bob, are you sure that was civil of you? Maybe you should get a PBC Dr. Bob.
I don't hate you anymore Dr. Bob. I like you again. Thanks for answering my questions in the thread about the new rule. That was nice of you to explain.
I'll try to be civil Dr. Bob, I really will.
Dr. Bob, when I meet you in Toronto, should I call you Dr. Bob? or Robert? or Bob? Should I call you Dr. Hsiung or Dr. Bob at the APA? You have too many names Dr. Bob. LOL
Deneb

Re: Grief board » Dr. Bob

Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2006, at 21:18:25

In reply to Re: Grief board, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:56:32

:-)
Thank you Dr. Bob.
I don't think I have any thoughts about the specifics, or even about the grief board. Just about redirecting posts there.
But if you told me what your thoughts were behind that suggestion, I might better understand.

Re: sharks ... Bob talks » ClearSkies

Posted by annierose on January 21, 2006, at 22:17:01

In reply to Re: sharks » Dr. Bob, posted by ClearSkies on January 21, 2006, at 20:47:36

And shows a sense of humor too!! : -)
Very wonderful indeed.

Re: sharks » ClearSkies

Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2006, at 22:24:53

In reply to Re: sharks » Dr. Bob, posted by ClearSkies on January 21, 2006, at 20:47:36

Isn't it? :)

Toph

Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2006, at 23:06:57

In reply to Jets » Dr. Bob, posted by Toph on January 21, 2006, at 18:17:36

Thanks for being the inspiration for Dr. Bob's imagery of alpha shark. :) It made me laugh.
But what I really wanted to say was that I'd really like to understand your experience with authority figures, and how that shapes your reactions to them, much better than I do. I feel bad that I sometimes don't fully understand how much I'm not understanding.
And I have my own experiences with authority figures that probably shapes my own reaction to them.
I thought it might make an interesting thread, and one that might lead to greater mutual understanding. But I figure that Dr. Bob would prefer that it not be on Admin.
If you're interested, I'd like to try.

Re: Jets » Toph

Posted by thuso on January 21, 2006, at 23:11:59

In reply to Jets » Dr. Bob, posted by Toph on January 21, 2006, at 18:17:36

> > > I come to Psycho-Babble not to agitate but rather to associate with others like myself.
> >
> > With sharks?
>
> I realize that the shark metaphor was mine, but I think you know I was speaking abstractly about posters who disrupt. Do you really think of me as a shark? Though I may have bitten a few people, I am hardly a predatory killer that others fear here. God, at least I hope not.
>
I don't think he's calling you a shark. I read it as him asking you if at the same time that you like to associate with others like yourself here...do you also like to associate with sharks? Not calling you a shark. He probably should have said "And with sharks?". I hope that made sense.

Re: Grief board

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 23:26:48

In reply to Re: Grief board, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 17:56:32

> I don't think I have any thoughts about the specifics, or even about the grief board. Just about redirecting posts there.
>
> But if you told me what your thoughts were behind that suggestion, I might better understand.
This suggestion?
> > So what if we keep it available, but automatically redirect any new posts to Social?
I just thought that if it wasn't kept active, but wasn't deleted, either, then new posts would need to go somewhere.
But I suppose it could stay, but just not have posts redirected to it anymore. Is that what you mean?
Bob

Re: Jets

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 23:26:54

In reply to Jets » Dr. Bob, posted by Toph on January 21, 2006, at 18:17:36

> > > I come to Psycho-Babble not to agitate but rather to associate with others like myself.
> >
> > With sharks?
>
> I realize that the shark metaphor was mine, but I think you know I was speaking abstractly about posters who disrupt. Do you really think of me as a shark?
Not at all. As thuso said:
> He probably should have said "And with sharks?".
Sorry about that!
> > Maybe some people stay, even though they feel uncomfortable, because they hope for acceptance. They see how accepting in general it is here.
>
> Yes, acceptance, that's important to me. And Babble is indeed a place where acceptance is commonplace.
And I think hoping for acceptance can be an authority issue, too...
> > And others know what it's like to be rejected. To be treated like a shark. So they empathize.
>
> I'm too far down the food chain to understand this one.
Sorry, I just meant that others may feel bad for those who are excluded here because they've been excluded themselves in the past.
> > Maybe some are here to defend. Maybe to them I'm the alpha shark. Maybe they accept feeling uncomfortable because they consider it to be for a good cause.
>
> Babble is a good cause.
Of course I agree :-) but what I meant was, some posters may stay even though they feel uncomfortable because they consider defending others against me -- being Jets? -- to be a good cause.
Bob

Re: authority » Dinah

Posted by Toph on January 22, 2006, at 0:33:59

In reply to Toph, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2006, at 23:06:57

I started to write some long description of my understanding of this issue on the Relationship Board (as a relationship dynamic, I felt it best there) and, well, it seems kind of complicate, and I'm sort of at an impass in therapy in being able to do much about it, so I erased it not having the energy to complete it. Sorry. I'd probably contribute if someone else wanted to get it started.

Re: Grief board » Dr. Bob

Posted by NikkiT2 on January 22, 2006, at 5:59:04

In reply to Re: Grief board, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2006, at 23:26:48

>"But I suppose it could stay, but just not have posts redirected to it anymore. Is that what you mean?"
Thats what I'd like. Its something thats been on my mind these past two days.. I'm about to lose my gran, and was worried that I'd post on social, it would get redirected to grief, and I'd never remember to go back there (I am a creature of habit completely, I check the boards I check, and forget entirely to check any others). I thus wouldn't thank people for their thoughts and support.
+++
As for the sharks discussion.
I think one of the problems is that when a Elephant falls into the aquarium, we're unable to name the Elephant, and thus discuss it.
I don't know how to over come it, but I think we can all be agreed that we do often have problems with elephants in the room, yet we don't seem to have an elephant keeper. Yes, we have the deputies, but when we are faced with the problems, there is little we can do to truly discuss them out without being "accusing" and thus being uncivil.
Just thoughts to ponder
Nikki

Re: Grief board

Posted by Toph on January 22, 2006, at 7:09:37

In reply to Re: Grief board » Dr. Bob, posted by NikkiT2 on January 22, 2006, at 5:59:04

>
> As for the sharks discussion.
>
> I think one of the problems is that when a Elephant falls into the aquarium, we're unable to name the Elephant, and thus discuss it...
I sure got a visual, Nikki. Elephants do seem obsessed with nuts and they can be so difficult to ignore. ; )

Re: Grief board » Toph

Posted by NikkiT2 on January 22, 2006, at 7:43:41

In reply to Re: Grief board, posted by Toph on January 22, 2006, at 7:09:37

Should I admit to having been trying to find a suitable pic of an elephant, and a suitable pic of an aquarium in order to put the two together in paint shop?!
Nikki

Please do, lol (nm) » NikkiT2

Posted by Toph on January 22, 2006, at 7:50:36

In reply to Re: Grief board » Toph, posted by NikkiT2 on January 22, 2006, at 7:43:41

Re: authority » Toph

Posted by Dinah on January 22, 2006, at 8:29:53

In reply to Re: authority » Dinah, posted by Toph on January 22, 2006, at 0:33:59

I understand. I'm not at my posting best right now, so it's probably for the best.

Re: unblocking with love

Posted by Dr. Bob on February 4, 2006, at 18:44:22

In reply to Posting with love » Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on January 15, 2006, at 15:00:16

> if a poster ... tries to comply with the civility guidelines, doesn't push the envelope, posts with charity to other posters, and then a fair period of time later comes afoul of the civility rules again, for example out of an excess of caring, passion, and a desire to help, why should that poster get a long block? Why not a one week cooling off block?
OK, the deputies and I have discussed this, and we're going to give it a try. I know it's been longer than 1 week, but I'm going to unblock Larry now.
Bob