Posted by mmcasey on June 8, 2003, at 15:54:44
I think this is very ironic....
I feel so lonely for the most part. Bored and lonely. I have no one to hang out with here, especially since my break-up. But I wish that I lived alone instead of with roomates. I always hope that they won't be there when I get home, and if they are I generally shut myself in my room, even if I don't want to. Because I just don't want to deal with them. It's too much effort to try to be social and talk to them. I'm perfectly chatty (at times) with some of the people I work with, but so reserved with the people I live with.
I frequently come to work after hours to go online, and I feel annoyed if anyone else is here. Like today for instance.... I didn't expect anyone to be here, but one of the shrinks that I work with is here. He's perfectly nice and everything, but I'd rather be alone. Why would I rather be alone when I'm so lonely? Why do I like to isolate myself so much? Why do I so often ignore the phone when it rings, despite my boredom and loneliness?
Why does everything suck so much?
I know the answer to all of this... oh that's depression for you. But still, it's ironic, and still, it really bites.
poster:mmcasey
thread:232438
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030604/msgs/232438.html