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Re: What do you do when you lose all hope » sam K

Posted by pedr on September 22, 2009, at 17:52:13

In reply to Re: What do you do when you lose all hope, posted by sam K on September 22, 2009, at 11:44:14

> This happens to me all the time. a good example is when I was on a cruise.. I thought of jumping off the side.. :(.
> When this happens, I "shut down". I just treat myself like a computer and shut myself down. I stop thinking and put off thinking for a while.
> Its so hard to explain, but its a coping mechinism Ive picked up over the years.
>
> Like when Im at my breaking point, I just shut down. If a computer was about to exlpode itd just shut off, but we just keep going.
> Lol, I dont think anyone will understand this haha.

Nope that's how I cope with repeated suicidal thoughts too. I don't listen to *any* thought I have when I'm in suicidal mode. I just bat every thought (that I am able to detect) away instantly, no matter what the content. I remember being on reboxetine (Edronax) and it gave me constant suicidal thoughts for 2 weeks, like a tape recorder on a loop. I just turned into a robot and ignored all cognitions. Again and again and again and again...

Don't get me wrong, it was an experience I wish upon no person walking this planet, but "shutting down" got me through it.


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